


The Joys of Autumn

by Caffeine_addict



Series: Silly baristas [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Autumn, Fluff, Happy Ending, Loki Needs a Hug, M/M, Slow Burn, i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-14
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2019-01-17 06:36:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12359655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caffeine_addict/pseuds/Caffeine_addict
Summary: Loki and Tony are co-workers in Starbuck's. Tony is relatively new and just finds out that Loki really hates autumn. He decides to make it right, by making him try autumnal stuff like pumpkin spice lattes and going to a fair.





	1. PSL

**Author's Note:**

> 1) Don't own these characters and I am not making any money off this  
> 2) My first fic! I've been reading these for so long. Honestly, should have done this sooner, it was so much fun.  
> 3) Will be updated every Saturday!

“Morning Darcy. Jane. Can I get you your regular?” Loki asked fully knowing that it is September 1st and that meant that pumpkin spice lattes are back on the menu. He may have withheld that information by failing to write it in the specials. Thirty minutes and no one has noticed. Not that Bucky, the manager, won’t brutally murder him for that later.

“Not going to work, my sweet raven-haired boy. We are fully aware of the date. We demand our pumpkin spice lattes! I have waited many a month for this and my taste buds will not be denied everyone’s favourite fall drink!” Darcy exclaimed while Jane was dragging her wallet out of her bag. “You’re thinking of mulled wine.” She interjected, “so sweet, yet so alcoholic.” Jane remembered their first date. It was so cold and mulled wine was chosen as the best choice for warming up the two. They got spectacularly drunk and Jane had to call her friend Thor to come get them. The date would have been a success if drunk Darcy hadn’t flirted with literally anyone.  
“Excuse me, but no. Eggnog tramples all your drinks.” Tony casually said as he was emptying the dishwasher. “For your information, he still hasn’t put in your drinks. Do it, Loki, come to the dark side” he whispered in his ear. Loki still has no idea how he keeps doing that since he is considerably shorter than him.  
“I was hoping some sense would come into them.” He bitterly replied as he charged the drinks. 

“Is that why you were so quiet? Usually you at least have one snide remark to offer. Were you trying to Charles Xavier us? Ha! It didn’t work! Our will power is TOO STRONG.” Darcy had a not so wonderful tendency to begin a sentence normally and end it very loudly and 2 inches from your face. This one was not an exception. In the last minute, the line behind them went from non-existent to considerable and Loki shuddered at the thought of the PSLs he would have to make that day. Darcy gave him the stink eye as she moved to the other end of the counter, while Jane tipped him and gave him an apologetic smile.  
The rest of the morning rush was spent in a coffee-making frenzy as Tony, Steve and Loki ran around taking orders, making those orders, collecting used cups and finally washing the said cups so the cycle could begin again. Eventually Bucky came out of his managerial hole and remarked as to the lack of fall decoration on the specials board. Loki smiled to himself. He at least made a difference for two hours as Darcy and Jane were the only ones who remembered that PSL came back today. So far. 

“Loki, when you have time fix the board.” Bucky said in his thick Russian accent. 

“Why, what did I do?” Loki asked innocently.

“You know what.” He simply replied and walked away from the conversation. His tattoo sleeve was visible despite the fact that it was cold outside due to the constant rain they had for the last three days. What kind of a monster would wear a t-shirt in this weather? Loki was fully aware the tattoos do look very cool, but that is no excuse. 

“So, he finally noticed.” Tony said as he was filling the dishwasher. Why was he always there? They didn’t even have that many customers with stay in cups. People preferred their stupid plastic ones. Much more instagramable. 

“Two hours, much better than last year. He noticed it in under an hour then.” Loki replied. 

Tony considered this new information. Clearly Loki was waging a war on PSL and that is just un-American. No that is anti-autumnal and that cannot be right. Every season change was sacred in his mind. Even if he got bored in two weeks. But autumn was his favourite. The leaves, the pumpkins, the toffee apples and best of all, Halloween. Fall just did not cover it as much as autumn did, fall was a season. Autumn was a state of mind.

“So, you hate pumpkin spice lattes then? I mean too many people order them, and maybe the overall taste has been a little too commercialised in the last few years, what with all the pumpkin spice cookies and pop tarts and coffee and even condoms, but it helps to get into the spirit of things. The spirit of autumn, the best of all seasons there is.” Tony’s eyes glazed over as he imagined how amazing it will be to bite into his first toffee apple as the bonfire would radiate heath…

“Earth to Stark. Are you there?” Loki enquired as Tony has been immobile for a bit. 

“Never mind him,” Steve said, “he is stuck in the ‘autumn’ feeling.” Loki raised his eyebrows. “Yes autumn, not fall. He was adamant about that. And he’s been telling me all about his plans for the last two weeks. I am surprised that he did not enter with fall leaves while singing ‘it’s here’.” 

“Maybe he spared that for tomorrow.” Loki said as he was clearing the board. “If I write PSL in my best handwriting, will you draw some leaves?” He asked Steve. Everyone here knew how much he liked to decorate the board. 

“Leaves! That’s what I forgot!” Tony snapped back from his reverie. “I knew I had something spectacular planned for this morning. Wait what time is it? Maybe it is not too late.” The human equivalent of an excited puppy began his run to the door, but was soon blocked by Bucky. 

“No leaves.” He said in his best intimidating voice, which was 17 times more intimidating than other people’s. 

“But it’s autumn.” Tony whined. “We must celebrate that.” 

“And we shall. We have our own fall tradition here.” 

“We do?” Loki asked surprised. He was just wiping the board to re-do it, so he had to turn his upper body to participate in the conversation. “I’ve been here for three years and that is the first I’ve heard of that.” He though some more. “Unless you count giving people caramel lattes instead of PSL and seeing how few notice that.”  
Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose in desperation. “I told you to stop doing that two years ago.” 

“No, you told me to stop giving them lattes with PSL dressing. And I have.” 

Bucky sighed. His parents did not bring him all the way to America so he could argue with a pasty white boy over correct orders. Why he was brought here in the first place was a completely different matter. 

“Give people their fucking orders.” With that he left. 

Loki and Steve looked at each other. Bucky issued many threats over the years regarding orders. Usually to Natasha who enjoyed giving people what they ordered but just a tiny bit wrongly. If you ordered a caramel latte, you would still get it but with two pumps, instead of three. If you ordered a flat white, she would give you a latte and vice versa. She loved being just mean enough, as most people never noticed. Loki was good with his orders, but hated PSL with a passion. 

“So, what is our autumnal tradition? I want to know. I need to know. Please Steve tell me. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, pl-”

“Ok, enough. I will tell you. Later.” He went to the register where a client conveniently appeared. He’s hiding something, Loki thought. This is the first he heard of an autumnal tradition. 

“Will you tell me?” Tony tuned to Loki. 

“I don’t know it.” He shrugged his shoulders and went about his day.

Next morning Darcy and Jane appeared again. This time Tony was at the register and he was more than happy to serve them Loki’s most despised drink. 

“Oh yes boi, I want all the whipped cream!” Darcy nearly shouted as Jane refused hers. “You cannot have that much whipped cream Darcy. You had three PSLs yesterday all with cream! You ran around our apartment saying you were the great pumpkin and have come to make all my wishes come true.” She turned to Tony, “and when I said I wished she would stop, she sulked. I thought you were a wish-granting pumpkin.” 

“And I thought you would ask for something fun, like sex.” 

“I don’t need to ask, babe. I got more game than that.” Jane wiggled her eyebrows and Darcy laughed so hard she cried.

“Good thing she is easily entertained.” Jane said and calmly paid for their drinks. Then her face lit up, “I just released; I am literally her sugar daddy” she said and chuckled. “Nice.” Tony was very amused by the couple, and found Jane the more likable of the two. Not because she was the more normal one, but she had a freaky side and he respected that.

Loki walked in, visibly shaken. 

“What’s the matter goth boy.” Tony ‘greeted’ him. 

“One I am not goth boy; my hair is naturally dark and I really am that pale. I am British. If you are not see through, they take away your right to Brit. And two, I just saw three leaves fall. They landed right in front of my feet. No one will forget that fall is here now. The PSLs I will have to make. The pumpkins I will be forced to carve. God, Stark, the horror is endless.” 

“Ok this is simply too much. Loki Laufeyson (also what kind of name is that) I will show you the true meaning of autumn and you will love it and stop making people miserable with your Scroogeness.” 

“Scrooge hated Christmas.” Loki stated. 

“I know that, but there is no autumn equivalent! Anyway, you will be rid of your seasonal misanthropy. And I just know how. I’ve been thinking about it all night.” Loki raised his eyebrow but remained silent. 

“This is the three-step Tony Stark autumn state of mind™ programme. Step one, the pumpkin spice latte. Just the one. Drunk while sitting in a Starbuck and reading a book like the ultimate white girl. Bonus points if you are taking notes.”

“I hate PSL. You know that. No way am I drinking one.” Loki seemed unconvinced at the effectiveness of this plan. He already hated step one. 

“We will do it together. When we are not working. IE a Starbucks that is not our workplace. That would be just traumatic. And Natasha would probably poison us.” Tony retorted. He was not letting this go. He has been aimless for so long and finally he found the perfect cause in his life. Spreading autumnal joy. 

“Next step would be watching a scary movie. Blankets and tea are obligatory and hopefully it will get much colder as –“

“Make the goddamn latte Stark! Loki! Stop standing, the morning rush is here!” Natasha screamed as she manned the register alone. There were already 6 orders waiting and they knew the customers would get seriously disgruntled if they weren’t filled soon. No one comes between people and their morning coffee. The plan would have to wait. 

Once the coast was clear Tony wasted no time getting right back to his explanation. 

“Right, so step two. Blankets, tea, fire in the fireplace and a nice scary movie. Don’t you dare tell me that you are against all that? And you are British, I am sure it is against the law to hate tea there. Is that why you’re here. I mean you do work in a coffee shop. Have you been deported due to your lack of love for leaf water?” 

Loki sighed. He glanced at Natasha who looked mildly concerned, but mostly amused by the way Stark followed him like a shadow as he went to the toilet. He really hoped that he would not follow him into the cubicle. Tony didn’t follow him, but instead he stood outside and calmly (that is with a lot of excitement and calm disregard for other people) continued talking. 

“So, step two, Loki. Loks. Tell me. Is that acceptable?” 

“Yes, Stark. Tea is acceptable, but I am not snuggling with you.” 

“Even if I say no homo?” he pleaded. 

“No homo has not been a thing for two years. And no. And for the record I am full homo, so excuse me if I don’t care to snuggle with a work colleague.”  
There was a silence at the other end. Ughh. 

“Ok.” Tony said cheerfully, “separate blankets. Now step three will require more effort. One of my favourite things in autumn is going to a fair, eating toffee apples and then hopefully lighting a huge pile of wood on fire.” 

Loki washed his hands and again Stark followed his every move. 

“Step three sounds like too much effort. And apples are delicious on their own, what kind of monster would drown them in caramelised sugar and then enjoy that?” 

“But think about it, Loki. It would be so much fun.” Tony have him his best puppy eyes and hoped he would agree to his plan. 

“This plan of yours?” Loki tentatively began.

“Yes?”

“Why should I do it? I am just fine hating autumn.” 

Tony took a deep breath. 

“Because no one can hate autumn on my watch, it is great and amazing and the only time where no gifts are required to enjoy it, really it is more about the state of mind.” Loki seemed unconvinced. 

“It will make your life less like living hell when people order PSL?” Tony offered. 

Loki considered it for a moment. Stark was annoying at times, but he always meant well. Like a month ago when he bought 30 people their drinks because he felt like it. Loki has no idea how he can afford that, but he thought it rude to ask. Besides, Stark would not let this ‘programme’ go. He would badger him until Loki agreed, so he might just as well agree now. 

“Fine. We’ll go tomorrow afternoon.” 

“YES!” Tony exclaimed and spent the rest of the day in such high spirits that Natasha threatened to punch him five times in the space of two hours.  
When the time came for them to meet, Tony was already waiting outside the chosen Starbucks (by Tony obviously. Because it had the best seats, according to him). 

“Yasssss, Loki. Pumpkin spice latte. Pump – kin” he made sure to pop his lips when he said that, “spice. Latte. It is finally the time. And you have to order it.” Loki rolled his eyes. 

“I know, you said that seven times yesterday. In 20 minutes.” 

“Did you bring your book?” Tony asked. He was carrying a well-worn copy of Stephen King’s IT. Loki, on the other hand, had an immaculate Cambridge satchel, complete with his initials embossed. Posh boy. 

“Yes, I did.” 

“Are you going to tell me which one it is?” Tony asked. Loki almost never shared personal information, while everyone and their grandmother knew what Tony did  
during the weekend. It was hard to imagine what Loki did. Tony imagined he tracked down and killed vampires in his spare time. 

“Why should I? You will see it soon enough.” He teased. 

“Because I want to know now?” 

“Oh dear, did your parents not teach you to be patient.” Loki continued teasing. 

“I am very patient compared to my father. I think. They weren’t around much and the they died when I was 17.” 

“I am sorry to hear that.” To Tony’s ears he sounded genuine. 

“Don’t worry about it. It’s been a while. Show me your book instead.”

“Later, I’m about to order.”

When it was their turn Loki took a deep breath, and said as calmly as possible. “Two grande pumpkin spice lattes. No cream. Stay- in, please.” 

“See, that wasn’t so hard.” Tony encouraged. 

“Shut up.” Loki snapped. 

“Never.” Loki rolled his eyes and carried their drinks to an absurdly comfortable-looking booth. Tony watched him intently as he undid the claps on his satchel and pulled out Ada by Valdimir Nabokov.

“Really? Ada? Do you have to be such a show off?” Tony said. 

“I like Nabokov. He is a very good writer.”

“You could have just brought Lolita, it would have shamed me enough.” 

“Stephen King is a master of his genre, there is no need to be ashamed.”

“That has to be the nicest thing you have ever said to me.” Tony said touched.  
Loki picked up his drink, completely ignoring Tony’s gratitude and sighed. “No time like the present.” He took a small sip and pulled a face. 

“That bad?” 

“I know the taste. I’ve had this drink before. And that is impossible as I have never had a PSL.” He paused and took another sip. He knew that unmistakable flavour. He had this drink before. Many times. 

“Stark, I know what the autumn tradition is.”  
 


	2. A Scary Movie

“I know what the autumn tradition is. How dare you give me pumpkin spice lattes when I ask for coffee.” Loki announced to Natasha and Steve. She smiled slyly as Steve had the decency to look contrite. 

“I knew he would figure it out. And it’s not right. I am sorry, Loki. I shouldn’t have let them do it for so long.” Steve looked like he just ran over a small child’s pet right in front of the child. And the child was crying obviously. 

“Honestly, I thought it would take you much less time to figure it out. You know what caramel lattes taste like. It’s nothing like a pumpkin spice latte. But when you didn’t… we were in too deep.” Natasha added as Bucky went past, pretending like he hadn’t heard the conversation. 

“Bucky.” Loki said in an ice-cold voice. He was good at that. Usually he reserved it for rude costumers, but this PSL switcheroo was plain rude.

“I am busy.” He replied as he went by at full speed. Now if he could just avoid Loki for the rest of his life. He was not scared of much, but Loki gave him secret serial killer vibes. It is always a good idea to avoid anyone that gives you those vibes. 

Loki opened his mouth, but he was not fast enough to catch him. All he could do was should “This is not over” very unintimidatingly after the Russian manager. He turned to the red-headed woman. 

“Natasha, I expected more from you.” She just stared at him, highly amused and then when on with her work. Loki was clearly very salty about the whole situation. She just found it amusing. Steve still looked very apologetic. As he should be, thought Loki. 

“Loki, I really am sorry.” He began again. 

“Yeah whatever. Let’s get to work.” Loki emptied the dishwasher and did his best to be an impregnable fortress for the rest of the day. He failed when Steve brought him an apology drink and accidentally thanked him. Clearly his manners were ingrained into him so thoroughly that he would thank the person murdering him for their time. As he continued to work he thought about his weekly autumn adventure. Last week he and Stark had the drink. He wondered what other information was withheld from him that would suddenly be revealed by Stark’s enthusiasm for autumn. Perhaps he would find out that IT was actually a romantic comedy about a boy and a clown. He’s seen it before obviously, but he was very young and had trouble sleeping for a week afterwards. Stark, he thought. As annoying as he was he was growing on him. He was like a puppy you can’t shake off and maybe you don’t want to. He had a scary thought that perhaps he is nearing those territories. He did very much enjoy horror films, but Loki had a penchant for the absolutely bloodies ones he could find, the kinds that were very stupid in their use of fake blood. Blood and gore he had no issue with, but small scary children or worse even ghosts, gave him the creeps. If Stark chose one of those he would be forced to either fess up or suffer in silence. 

Loki spent the rest of the day alternating between fuming at his colleagues and thinking about how ridiculous Stark’s plan was. There was no way this was going to make him like autumn more. All he did so far was to expose two (possibly three) people as evil pumpkin dealers.   
His reverie extended to his walk home and was only broken by a text from Tony himself. 

*Loki! Remember our film night is tomorrow. Only bring your charming self and I shall take care of the rest.* 

Loki shouldn’t have been surprised to hear that Stark needed to be overly amusing in texts too. However, if there was anything he was good at, it was overturning funny texts. 

*Oh dear, my charming self is rented out for the duration of the film. Will my grumpy self do?*

*Fine.*

Tony smiled to himself. He was surprised that Loki put up so little resistance. He imagined that he would have to physically drag him to his apartment. Maybe that part was yet to come. The brunet wasn’t sure how he would overpower him; sure, he was paper thin, but he was tall and could kick up a fuss if he wanted to. And he googled Ada. He was shocked to see him read about incest. He wondered what else the autumn-hater was hiding. Perhaps he had lots of secret hobbies that turned out to be dorky and super adorable. Tony had a theory that Loki was a secret softie and that his cold demeanour was just a façade to deter the less determined. Tony planned to smash right through it. 

When the day of Loki’s visit arrived, Tony realised that he went a little bit overboard. He literally raided the Yankee candle store for their best scents. And then he got Woodwick candles too because he just loved the way the stem cracks. Overall, he bought 17 candles in various sizes and smells. There was Loki’s ‘favourite’ PSL, autumn leaves, more orangey candles (he had 3 at home), 2 cranberry smelling ones and some non-autumnal ones that Tony just enjoyed having. Suddenly the bell rang. 

Tony opened the door. Loki seemed impressed. Then he remembered that he forgot to warn him about his rather large apartment. 

“Are you a secret millionaire and work at Starbucks because you love coffee?” Loki blurted out. 

“Oh yes. That.” Tony said. “I forgot to tell you. Come in first, it’s a long story. Not as complicated as you think, but still not something I always tell. Not because it is bad, but—” 

“Shut up, Stark. I get it.” Loki interrupted rather harshly. He saw the shock on Tony’s face and continued in a more reaffirming fashion, “you can tell, or not tell me anything, at your own pace.” With that the tall man entered the extremely impressive property and was immediately hit by the warmth. Stark appeared to have bought all the candles in Manhattan and then proceeded to light them. 

“Normally I would let you choose your own tea, but as we are getting in the festive mood I know just what we need.” Tony seemed less elated than a second ago. Loki panicked, he shouldn’t have interrupted him. However, he had a suspicion that if left uninterrupted Tony would talk until he starved to death. 

“Really and what is that?” The lean man leaned on the counter and watched Tony run around his massive kitchen. There was every kitchen gadget imaginable there. A waffle maker and a cake pop maker, he even had a kettle. Loki was extremely happy, kettles are hard to come by in the US and if had to suffer microwaved tea he would die. “Well, winter flavour tea obviously. It must be super sweet as well. Like it might rot your teeth kind of sweet.” 

“Ahh yes, the non-descript winter flavour. My favourite.” 

“Funny.” Tony replied flatly.

The normally hyperactive man turned on the kettle and focused on Loki. The harsh light in the kitchen did not make him look green like everyone else. Rather, the black hair stood out. It was impressively dark and gave no indication of being natural. 

“So, you dye your hair?” Tony remarked. 

“Yes. You didn’t think this was natural?” 

“Of course not, but there is always a chance that your hair is such a dark brown it just looks black. Also you have a habit of defensively saying your hair is naturally dark. Why do you do it? Is it the aesthetic? You shouldn’t be ashamed of the aesthetic.” Tony gasped as he realised that meant brown wasn’t his natural hair colour. “Is your hair actually blond?” 

Loki smiled. Stark sure knew how to prioritise the trivial. 

“My hair is dark brown. Not unlike yours in colour.” 

“Oh my god, we are secret hair twins. This is the best news I’ve heard all day.” Tony dunked the tea bags in the hot water. An uncomfortable silence spread through the room. 

“It was my parents’. This apartment.” Tony said in a soft voice. He was not looking at Loki, who now focused on the brown-haired man. Suddenly, he seemed so much smaller to him, like he shrunk in the last minute. 

“My father created a multi-billion-dollar company. He would supply the military with weapons, but he always loved inventing new things. Shit father though.” Tony smiled sadly at a faraway memory. Loki wanted to hug him and apologise for whatever happened there, but he knew it wouldn’t help. He had his own daddy issues after all. “When I was 17 they died in a car crash. I got the company next year, but it was taken from me by dad’s partner. My frequent parties were apparently too much of a liability. He’s dead now though. So, technically I still own the majority, but I have very little say in it. That’s a lie. I am totally best friends with the CEO. She tells me everything. I am not really sure if I want to work there anyway. It’s just the impossibility of it that makes it so appealing.” Tony knew he was laying his tale of woe far too soon, as he always had the habit of doing. Truthfully, he just hated the face everybody made when they heard it. It was the same one Loki was making – pity and sadness followed by a realisation that this guy is loaded. 

“Ok, happy stuff, happy stuff!!” Tony clapped in between each word to elevate the mood. “I see your sad face and that is strictly forbidden in my three-step programme.” 

“I did not know we had such elaborate rules.” Loki smiled, if Tony wanted to ignore his past, Loki had no problem doing just that. “What are we watching? I have to tell you I am not good with ghosts.” He accepted the steaming cup of tea. The Brit took a sip, it was incredibly sweet and very good. 

“I might have lied. Well, not lied, as much as spoke too soon. See, as I presented the three step programme, I presented it as a scary movie but then I realised there is a small batch of Halloween movies, and as you know Halloween is the peak autumn tradition and should be celebrated as such. That said, we are watching Beetlejuice.” 

“Beetlejuice?” Loki said incredulously. 

“It’s that or Hocus Pocus. Do you want to spend the evening staring at young Sarah Jessica Parker or young Winona Ryder?” 

Loki remained unconvinced, but still replied. “Beetlejuice it is. This tea is very good by the way.” 

“A compliment? From you? I am going to melt of happiness. Quick! Say some more nice stuff and watch me collapse.”

“Why would I do that? Is does not seem particularly entertaining.” His face showed how pleased he was. Tony seemed like a good egg. 

“Spoilsport. C’mon let’s go snuggle.” Loki shot him an evil look. “Separately.”

Loki followed him to the epicentre of the great autumn candle shrine where two leaf-shaped coasters were placed on a beautiful glass coffee table. There were two blankets ready. Tony had an array of biscuits already placed. Compared to the rest of the apartment the light was positively orange; there was not one electric light in sight, everything was illuminated by two gigantic PSL candles, two small ones and at least six tea candles positioned around the room. In addition to all this, there was a fire roaring in the middle of the room. Real of fake, this was a delicate setup. Loki was touched at the amount of trouble Stark went through to do all this for a person he barely knew. He imagined what it must be like if you are a person he knows well. Somewhere out there a person is breathing and they probably own the Moon. Courtesy of Tony Stark. 

The black-haired man grabbed a blanked and expertly made himself into a blanker burrito, complete with crossed legs. His face peeked out of a small gap, but otherwise he was completely covered with the blanket. He knew how he liked to get cosy, even if he looked like he was eight. 

Tony seemed surprised as he saw him. “Do not say a word.” 

“It’s just that you give off this vibe. Like you are the most serious person to ever serious on this planet, and then you transform into a blanket tent. It’s very confusing.” 

“Good. My plan is working.” 

“I never asked you why you hate autumn so much.” Tony said as the opening tune to Beetlejuice played in the background.

“Do you always talk during a film?” 

“No, but do you imagine we will be sitting here in silence?” Tony quickly retorted. 

“We won’t be in silence, the film has sound.” Loki just knew that Stark rolled his eyes so hard the whites showed, even though he did not look. 

“You know what I mean.” For the first time in their brief acquaintance, Stark sounded exasperated. Loki did have a terrible habit of crushing unbridled optimism. But since Tony shared his sad tale, Loki figured he could return the favour. After all, it was a fair question. 

“Do you want the long version or the short one?” He asked. 

“That depends… How long is the long one?” Tony cheered up. 

Loki sighed and took a sip of his tea. “When I was 11, our family moved to America because my father’s business was expanding and he wanted to be there. My mum, Frigga, dragged us all to a fair complete with a pumpkin patch and all that autumn crap that Americans seem to love. It was her attempt to bring us together as a family… things were not going well, and I always hated people and never fit in. My brother is the opposite of that. He gets alone with everyone. He’s tall and blonde and muscular. And I suppose that should have been a big enough hint.”   
Tony was drinking his tea while staring intently at Loki. He could not believe that he was willing to be so open with him, considering that he did not even know he had a brother a minute ago. “Essentially, I overheard my father saying to mum that adopting me was a huge mistake and that she was too much of a bleeding heart. To give her credit, she protested all his claims. It still hurt though. I just wish I hadn’t hid in the haunted house. That scarred me for life.”   
It was Tony’s turn to give Loki the sad look he despised so much. He knew how he felt since he heard what a disappointment he was almost daily. Hearing that once hurt, but hearing it repeatedly anchored the sentiment deeply in your soul, and sometimes Tony thought, it could never be fully removed. He had a nasty suspicion that Loki heard it much more than once. 

“Can we watch the film now?” Loki asked. He really wanted to avoid talking about this today. He was having such a nice day and there really was no need to think about that. 

“Yes, we can.” Tony unpaused the film and for full 10 minutes nobody spoke. For Tony that was a massive achievement, he usually cracked at five. 

“Ok, I have to make comments, please let me do it, I will die if I don’t.” Tony blurted it all out. Loki seemed stunned, but regained his composure quickly. 

“You can talk if you want to. It would be a shame if you died.” He smiled at him. Loki really was getting far too fond of him. 

“Thank god. Oh, you kind person.” He hugged his companion who again put up very little resistance. Tony heard a mug be deposited on the table and then felt two arms grab him in a proper hug. Everything about Loki seemed to be shocking (ie confirming that he is in fact, a softie), like the fact that he was an excellent hugger. Seriously, he even shifted his position on the couch to make him more comfortable. 

Meanwhile, Loki was very much enjoying the hug. Human contact was few and far between – he had friends that he loved very much, but he spent a large portion of his life alone. Always has. And it has been a while since his last relationship; to be completely frank, that one deteriorated into a war zone where both parties devoted their time to hurting each other as much as they could. His boyfriend even got him fired. He was yet to recover from that blow, although he liked his current job. It was not as glamourous, or earned him as much money as the one before, but he liked his co-workers and the regular patrons. Maybe this was the universe telling him he needed to move on. Not in a romantic sense, but let the past go. He may have distanced himself from his family and found new friends, but he felt like something was holding him back. He has been a barista for three years now. Sad, considering he once had such a promising future. This would be as good a time as any to stop being so bitter. Even if he secretly enjoyed it. 

Tony broke the silence. “Who knew you are so huggable.” He felt Loki’s body move as he chuckled, but he stayed put. 

“My hugs are a luxury few can afford.” 

“I knew there was a catch.” 

“I’m taking you for all you’re worth Stark.” 

“I have a name.” Although he did like the way Loki pronounced his last name. Tony knew he called everyone by their last name. It was not meant to be evil, it was just him. 

“Sure, you do, as you have a last name, Tony.” 

Tony tore himself from Loki’s arms and audibly gasped. 

“I contain multitudes, this is not such a momentous event.” Loki tried to control the excited Tony puppy.

“Firstly, I recognise your Whitman reference. Secondly, yes, it is. The only people you call by name are Darcy and Jane and that is because you don’t know their last names.” 

“Shhsssh, or I will stop calling you Tony.” Loki fake threatened. He was enjoying the attention. How was such a small thing so important to him? 

“Can you change the subject please?” Loki asked. 

"Ok, I’ll tell you a terrible joke instead. Why did Adam get the first fig leaf?” 

“I don’t know, why did he get the first leaf?” Loki felt like he was falling into a pun trap, but could not stop it. Tony blurted out the answer before he even finished his question.

“Because he wore the plants in the family." 

Loki groaned as he heard the pun. “That physically hurt. Seriously.” 

“Not enough to make you leave, right?” Tony panicked. Some people really hated puns. 

“Of course not. You better be-leaf that.” The brunet was so stunned now that he could barely breathe. He heard Loki make a joke before that, but they were always clever observational comedy. This was new. He liked this person even more than he did before. Actually, he just liked Loki. He was great. And far too beautiful for his own good. 

“I am offended, but also pleased.” 

“Tony?” 

“Yes?” 

“Can we watch the fucking film now?”  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is! Chapter two. Hope the automnal tradition was to your liking. if not just go along with Loki being very unskilled at detecting coffee flavours. Honestly, they are all the same sometimes.   
> The more you read it, the less the puns hurt. Trust me. I read this like 7 times.


	3. Toffe Apples

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello readers! I know I am a day early, but I will be away and I couldn't possibly deprive you of this. This is a very exciting chapter and my personal fave. It shall contain (in no particular order): a cat, a corgi, cotton candy, Jane and Darcy cuteness AND a special appearance by someone from Loki's past! 
> 
> In other news, this now has 7 chapters instead of 6 because I decided to add some more Loki and Tony hanging out with no plot time.

Loki’s phone buzzed as he received a text from Tony.

*this may be traumatic, but I still think you should go to the fair*

He sighed. Objectively Tony was right. It had been so long and there was little reason to be afraid. Not like Thor or his father will show up. And he liked Tony; he rambles too much for sure, but his heart is in the right place. His youthful joie de vivre made Loki want to be a better person; less of an ice king and more of a prince. 

*alright then.* 

*YEAHH BOIIII.*

*say/write that again and I will strangle you.* 

Like any reasonable person he disliked boi. Also that meme was deader than a doornail. Oh yes, he enjoyed memes. The Russian cat ones were the best. Tony discovered that quite soon, since he kept tagging him in memes on Facebook. Loki retaliated by adding him on Instagram and spamming him with newer, fresher memes. Tony was the only colleague he followed there – although, he enjoyed stalking Rogers every now and then, since his golden retriever was adorable. As for himself, he felt like he was moments away from telling Stark about his cat’s account. 

*Understood. I will use my best detective skills to find a fair near us.*

*That is a lie.*

*I have found it*

*Two weeks ago*

*It’s gonna be lit, fam.* 

The tall man snorted so loud he woke up Luna – his grey sphinx cat. Some people dislike hairless cats, stupidly saying they look too mean; or that they are inside out. Those people do not deserve Luna’s company. Or that of any cat. 

“It’s ok, sweetheart. Tony was just being strange again.” He took her into his lap and quickly kissed her head. “Look at this ridiculous statement.” Luna was not too interested by the phone and was soon on her way. 

*where is this fair then?* When ghosted by one’s own cat it is best to not look too desperate. 

*surprise, I’ll drive us there. In case you decide to escape.*

 

*I don’t own a car, so how am I doing that?*

*More reason for me to drive.* 

In his apartment Tony was pacing. He was getting good at telling when Loki was being serious or not. The TV was blabbing in the background – New Girl was on. As much as Tony still liked the show, much to the amusement of Natasha who believed much of current TV was past its prime, he liked it more when it was background noise. He guessed she was right. In the past two weeks he had become Loki’s best work friend. Maybe even work husband, but he doubted that Loki saw it the same way. He had always been eerily unreadable (or so Tony was told, as he only knew him three weeks before all this began), but he was much more relaxed around him. The pair got along very well – last week Loki even suggested they get coffee in a non-autumn feeling way. And he did not get berated when he ordered a PSL. There might not have been much talking involved, but Tony finally understood that Loki was not as garrulous as him. He was still more silent then Stark would want him to be, but when he did talk, it was not about work. Loki genuinely wanted to get to know him.  
Back at work, Natasha and Steve were discussing the advantages of having a large phone. Natasha recently upgraded her Iphone for the latest model and decided to get it in plus size. She loved her huge phone so much, it was hard for her to believe that she could live with a normal-sized before. 

“I know it sounds very conceited, but I genuinely prefer the large size, it is just better for my hands.” So far, Steve showed to have strong feelings on the subject. 

“I just love it, makes my evening Netflix viewing even better.” The unreadable woman gushed. As they weren’t very busy, they could talk at their leisure. Or to any customer that happened to drop in. 

“Hello, my COFFEE-MAKING friends!!” Darcy loudly announced her entrance, as soon as she saw the lack of customers. 

“Hi, Darcy.” The pair greeted her in unison. 

“What heated debate have I interrupted?” she asked. 

“Large phones, good or fantastic?” 

“Oh, fanTASTIC. I love mine. Makes all the dirty pictures have so much more DETAIL.” Darcy did love oversharing. The guardians of the coffee tried to come up with a better answer than ‘gr…eat’, but since this was Darcy there is rarely any need to answer. 

“By the way, I am super excited because it has been getting cold and that means CHUNKY KNITS. Yaaaaaassssss, sweaters. Time to listen to The Neighbourhood. Be all COSY and shit. You know what I mean?” she asked with her nasal voice. When she first heard it, Natasha hated it; she assumed Darcy was putting on some sort of a show, but no, it was her voice. 

“Yes, I’ve been dressing my dog in raincoats during his morning walk.” 

“Why, Rogers? There hasn’t been much rain.” 

“No, but there is mist and it makes his hair damp. He is not a big fan of that feeling.” He told Darcy like they were conspirators in a revolutionary plan. 

“YOU have a DOG?!” Darcy gasped, “important question; is it a doggo or a doge?” she loved all dogs, there is no other way on the internet, but she had an unrelenting wish to pet a weiner dog. The woman hoped that she finally found a person that had one. 

“It’s a golden retriever.” Steve said proudly. God, he loved that dog. 

“Jane loves them, she says they always look so sad. I don’t know why you would want a sad dog?!” Natasha saw that Darcy had no intention of ending the conversation, so she asked the inevitable. 

“What can we make for you?” 

“Oh, yeah, coffee… Obviously, I want Loki’s most despised drink, the epitome of fall, the true white girl fuel…” 

“The PSL, we get it.” Tasha interrupted her. Steve gave her a look, there was no harm in humouring Darcy. 

“Killjoy. Two please, I want to surprise Jane at work.” The killjoy started making her order, but Steve continued his conversation with Darcy. 

“Do you have a dog?” he asked. 

“No, I am apparently irresponsible and cannot be trusted to keep a plant alive. That said, Jane is notoriously bad at dressing and feeding herself. Too caught up in her strange figures and theories.”

“Theories?” he was intrigued. 

“Yeah, she is one of those people trying to find the missing part of the universe.” Darcy said it all nonchalantly. This was the first time he heard any of this. 

“The universe is missing?”

“Umm, yeah… the scientist don’t know where 90% of it is. How the fuck, don’t you know where something THIS large is. Really weird. They are close to cracking it, though.” Darcy was very proud of her sciency girlfriend. So smol, yet so smart. 

“Here is your coffee.” Natasha placed two cups before Darcy. The coffee receiver got the message, she clearly wanted to be left alone with her dream boy. She could see  
the attraction, not her type (had a penis) but she made a mental note to set them up one day.

With Darcy gone, Natasha could once again enjoy the silence. 

“That was rude.” Steve Rogers said and walked away. Natasha just shrugged and drank her frapuccino. 

When the day finally arrived, Tony was like a small child on Christmas, expect he was probably more excited. And caffeinated – he barely slept all night, so he fired up his beautiful Keuring and had two double-shot espressos. In the space of 30 minutes. Even a small child knows that he made a horrible decision. To be honest, much of his excitement came because he bought Loki a present. Nothing much, just the tea they shared when watching Beetlejuice. He was doing his weekly shop, as he was passing the tea aisle and thought of the nice time they shared then. It was just a small thing, but Tony has been vibrating with excitement ever since. It wasn’t until he was in the car that he realised another important thing – the music. There is no such thing as autumnal music, other than Sweater Weather by The Neighbourhood, so he would have to choose it himself. Normally, Tony listened to AC/DC or Metallica, but that is hardly everyone’s cup of tea. After much deliberation he turned on the radio and left it at his favourite station. If annoyed, Loki could always change the station.  
Loki was waiting at the curb and texting his mother – the only family member he was still in contact with. She was surprised to hear he hated autumn this much (family activities were never their forte) and even more that he consented to be dragged around by his colleague. He did not know either why he did, but he was glad, as he stumbled upon a good friend. Perhaps they were not quite there, but Loki saw it going that way. Stark was his now and there was no way he was escaping his fate.  
A Range Rover. Sta- Tony has a Range Rover. Why is he ever surprised, Loki thought? It should have been obvious to him. The tall man sat in the passenger seat and raised an eyebrow to his companion. 

“What?” Tony asked. 

Loki exhaled. “I am disappointed I did not expect you to have a Range Rover.” He adjusted his seatbelt. 

“O. k… then.” 

“By the way, I am very happy my mental transmission worked and you put on a nice sweater.”

Loki looked down, he was wearing a dark green chunky knit jumper. It was a gift from his mother and he loved it because it is hard to find a nice green jumper. He considered the autumnal connotations – cold weather meant warmer clothes and Loki loved those. It also meant less scorching heat, so maybe Loki was a secret fan.  
The light turned red. Tony reached into the glove compartment and gave Loki the little box of tea. 

“For me?” he seemed surprised. “I didn’t get you anything.” He took it and observed it. “Thank you, I never expected this. It was very good tea.” Loki found it hard not to be as touched as he really was. People didn’t always think of him that much. He just didn’t get casual presents. 

“You’re making me blush. It fell in my shopping cart.”

Loki side eyed him and smiled. “If you say so. How long until we get there.” 

“About 30 minutes.” 

Loki considered this information. Tony saw how he pursed his lips as he did so and thought how un-childish it looked on him. He looked rather pretty as he did that. 

“Then tell me something.” He finally said. 

Tony was surprised. His passenger was well aware of his ability to ramble. This was an open invitation to do just that. What a golden opportunity. 

“Anything?” he enquired. “For any amount of time that I choose?” 

“Yes to both. I don’t feel like talking. I promise to make the appropriate noises when required.” 

Tony lit up; he didn’t even need to think about the subject. He launched right into it. 

“You are in for a treat. I will talk for the full 30 minutes and some more. I have been training all my life for this. Brilliant. Just amazing. You are probably regretting it already.” 

Loki opened his mouth to say something, but Tony was too quick. 

“Today, I went to Barnes and Noble because books. Those are great, but not the real reason why I was there. I mean, yes, it is a bookshop and it was a book I was after, but not just that. Otherwise it would be a quick trip. This was a pre-planned two hour thing. And I know what you are thinking, why would you go to a bookstore for two hours on purpose? You can get coffee and a book at home, you don’t need to go outside for that. Well, I wanted to find something. There is a book that I read once—actually it was read to me, it was a reading, the author was there and the whole shabang. It wasn’t a particularly good book, but there was a line that I thought you would like. So, I wanted to find it. I knew that I didn’t own the book, and that it came out 2 years ago. It was one of those books that serious people read, expect this one was really pretentious. Like I can tell when you are writing a good book and carefully chose your words, but this was like going through a Thesaurus and replacing every possible word with another, fancier one. It didn’t sell well, as you can imagine.”  
Loki was impressed. Firstly, he thought that Tony would choose a different subject, he is a very tech person and has spent many hours talking to Natasha about computers and all the new and crazy stuff people are producing. Once he casually mentioned he tried building an AI, but stopped because he no longer had access to it. The usually unresponsive red-head had eyes the size of saucers. As did he, to think of it. No, Loki was touched because Tony was going to great lengths to find a quote he might enjoy, from a book he did not remember. Him going to a reading in the first place was somehow the least surprising thing. 

“Can I interject?” Loki asked. 

“Yes, you may.” 

“Why go through all this trouble for a quote for me? Not that I am not flattered. No one has ever done as many nice things for me as you have. Are you always this thoughtful?” 

Tony considered this for a second (and actual second) and replied. “Yes and no. I try to be a nice and thoughtful person, but I spent ages being a massive asshole. I did things because I could and then other people dealt with the consequences. Frequently, I promised to be at places and then go on a holiday with underwear models.” 

Loki raised his eyebrow and looked very amused. 

“I am better now. But only because I have three actual friends. Well, four including you. If I am permitted to do that.” 

“Sure. I count you as my friend too. Why the quote?”

“It captured being friends with someone as you are not quite full BFFs, but are close to.” 

“I see. Did you find it?” 

“No. It wasn’t until I searched through piles of books that it occurred to me the quote might not be at the beginning.” 

Loki smiled. “The tea is gift enough. Although you may buy me a toffee apple.” 

Tony gasped, toffee apples were his favourite food and Loki already stated his dislike for them.

“You may continue your story.” 

The driver then told him what he did that day in detail. Normally that would be excruciating detail, but Loki did not mind. He focused on the story, that was somehow  
rendered very interesting by the amusing way Tony spoke. Not spoke, but used words interestingly. For example, the pile of books he amassed was not described as a pile but a ‘shit-ton of useless pretentious and overpriced literature spewed out by a bunch of Fitzgerald wannabes that need a way to justify their creative writing degrees’. This combination of words ensured that the time passed quickly. 

The fair was full of people – worse of children. If a small child vomited on him, Loki was going to become the world’s first vomit vigilante. “Are you ready?” Tony asked.  
The tall man was extremely nervous. He made clear that he will avoid any haunted house they might encounter. However, some fair games were acceptable. They barely made a couple of steps when he heard a very loud and familiar voice. 

“Hello DraCULa! How strange to see you here. With Tony!! Are you two on a date?! JaneE!! Come here, you are never going to believe this.” Tony and he looked at each other. Darcy was a nice customer because she broke the monotony, but they had no experience of her in real life. Clearly, she was just as special. 

“Darcy, we talked about this, you do not accost people by shouting at them. Greet them nicely.” She turned to the pair. 

“Hello, nice seeing you here, sorry for Darcy. She gets excited. She will mellow out soon.”

“No, I won’t.” her girlfriend immediately opposed. 

“I lied, you just get used to her.” They nodded. This might be much more interesting than anticipated. 

“You should JOIN us!” Darcy’s enthusiasm was pure and perpetual. Jane seemed embarrassed, but she loved her energy. It was a good counteract for her subdued  
personality. No astrophysicist ever forgot Jane once they met Darcy too. 

“We’d love to.” Tony said before Loki could even consider the offer. He glared at him, but Tony just bounced the negativity with a brilliant smile. 

“YaaaaSsss.” Darcy made sure to fully use her nasal cavity. 

“Well then, where shall we go first.” Jane was not entirely happy that Darcy dragged a stranger on their date, but those were usually the best. She was glad she bought  
that mulled vine minutes ago. This was not a sober event anymore. 

“Toffee apples!” Tony exclaimed. It dawned on Loki, he was his Darcy. They weren’t a couple, but shared a similar dynamic. Guess he was stuck apologising for other people, again. 

“Already had one, but let’s do this.” The two rushed off in the general direction of food, while Jane and Loki followed. 

“She already had one. Good thing she can eat an extraordinary amount of sugar before going full hyper.” 

“This is her normal state?” Loki was shocked. “How do you deal with that?” 

“I just do. It can be hard work, but—” 

Loki was gone. Jane turned around. What a mystery. Then she looked at the ground; Loki was hiding behind an empty Lucy the therapist stand. 

“Are you ok?” She seemed concerned, but was shushed by the crouching figure.

She tried asking again, but quieter. And leaning over the counter. “What is happening?” 

Before Loki could answer he heard a quick yelp and a booming greeting. 

“JANE, HOW ARE YOU? WAS THAT MY BROTHER I SAW WITH YOU.” It was Thor, who indeed was Loki’s brother. But they didn’t talk. 

“Brother?!” Darcy came back carrying two toffee apples. One was already bitten into. Tony was also there and likewise had two toffee apples. 

“YES, MY BROTHER LOKI.” 

Jane glanced at the counter. There was no way Loki was getting out of this, but a shameful reveal was never pleasant. Loki was aware of that too, because he got up and faced the music. 

“Hello, Thor.” Tony snorted. 

The tall blonde gave a bear hug to his now identified brother. The freakishly tall man looked small in his hands. 

“YOU HAVEN’T BEEN TO ONE OF THESE SINCE—”

“I was revealed to have been adopted? Yes, you are right.” 

Darcy’s eyes were wide as saucers. She and Tony were living for the drama. This was better than any TV show. Jane had more human emotions and felt bad for Loki, but was still much more entertained than she had ever been. 

Thor stopped hugging his estranged brother, but kept his hold on his arms. The look in his eyes was serious, he took time looking at the embarrassed Loki and finally spoke in a more subdued voice.

“Why did you never return my calls? You changed your number, you moved and even quit your job after what happened with Jake.” 

“I was sacked actually.”

“That does not matter. Mother refuses to say where you are. I worried.” 

Loki processed the information, but was still in the iron hold of Thor. Darcy chewed her toffee apple absentmindedly, but was being dragged away by Jane. She thought it would be best to leave them some privacy. The doctor was so considerate to nudge Tony who walked away with the pair. They did not go that far, but enough that the conversation was not audible. 

“Well, that was intense. Still is.” Darcy finally said. She was freed of a toffee apple that was now in Jane’s hand. “We shouldn’t look… that much.” Tony said. Without words they all concentrated on the teenager trying to win a stuffed bear for his girlfriend. He was not doing well, but his shame was more bearable that Loki’s.  
In their corner of the fair, Thor and Loki were now standing apart. There was still some animosity on Loki’s part, but that was being diffused with every word spoken. 

“I am deeply sorry for everything I have done that made you think I never cared for you as a brother.” Thor implored Loki. The black-haired man did not react verbally, but motioned for his brother to continue speaking. 

“What can I do to make things better?” He asked. Loki considered this – he knew something had to be done, but he had no idea what. He thought some more and chose something easy. 

“You may see me at work sometime. I will not pretend like I have never met you.” The blond bear nodded. It was not much, but it was a start. 

“I will leave now.” Loki walked away towards Tony who was feigning interest in cotton candy. Truthfully, he was the most interested adult there; all the others were desperate parents trying to keep their children clean. 

“Don’t do that, you will find a way to get it in your hair.” Loki said as he sneaked up on him. Jane and Darcy were standing nearby engrossed in a conversation (about their newfound boycott of Taylor Swift, by the sound of it). 

“Not true.” Tony said as he ordered the largest pink cloud. Loki was impressed by his optimism. 

“Here, this is yours.” Tony handed him a toffee apple and Loki smiled warmly at him. He worried this was going to be a disaster, but nothing worse could happen now. 

“So, that was your brother.” The brunet attempted to gain some background information on that whole situation. 

“Yes. But I am not telling you what happened.” He took a bite of his apple. It was sweet and the toffee encasing was crumbly, but it was still amazing. Maybe he was  
missing out on this. 

“Not yet anyway.” He continued. 

“Is there a punch card that tells me how close I am to gaining that information?” Loki gave his companion a doubtful look. 

“My friend gave me one, except it was amount of times I will cover for you in a year. Still have two left.” Tony boasted.  
“Out of?”

“12” he admitted sheepishly. 

“Much less admirable I see.” Loki joked. He was not averse to the idea, as stupid as it sounded at first. They walked past a lot of dogs and Tony pointed out every single one. He was the most excited Loki saw him. Until they saw a corgi. The internet’s currently favourite animal; and Loki’s kryptonite. 

“Tony, it sploofed.” He stopped in his tracks and admired the adorable creature. 

“Like what you see, Dracula?” A familiar voice gained his attention. It was the much feared Natasha Romanoff. Tony gasped and placed a hand on his chest so hard he  
punched himself. 

“You have a corgi.”

“I know, it’s incredible.” Loki responded. He was still looking at the dog, it could have been the Pope’s for all he cared. “You can pet her. Her name’s Buttercup.”  
Loki knelt down to pet Buttercup; he was utterly transfixed by her beauty. He had a vague understanding that a conversation was happening and that he should care about it, but there was a dog. 

“Tell anyone at work and I will gut you.” She threatened. Tony understood that, Natasha cultivated a ‘too cool for anything’ persona and a dog, a corgi of all, would shatter that image. In the distance Bucky saw what looked like a modern day rendering of a renaissance courtyard scene. Apparently, every person that ever came into his Starbuck’s decided to come here at the same time; he even saw Jane and Darcy a minute ago. He narrowly avoided that, although Darcy’s voice still resonated in his head. It’s not that he disliked her, just that she was a taste he had no wish to acquire. 

Now even Tony was petting Buttercup who was enjoying all the attention. Natasha caught Bucky’s eyes and shrugged. He decided to go round the fair again. Maybe win her a stuffed toy that she could despise. Loki pulled his shit together. He felt like he just emotionally cheated on Luna, not that this was the healthiest of emotions. 

“Finally, I thought you were going to kidnap my dog.” Natasha sounded harsh, but there was a slight tenderness in her voice. “Sorry about that. I used to have one when I was little.” 

“Like seeing an old friend.” She finished the thought for him. Tony turned to Loki, for a while now he had an urge to find out everything about him. All the stupid little things like favourite brand of toilet paper and the important stuff like where he grew up. 

“I hope you run an Instagram account for her.” Tony stated. He took out his phone and started searching for her. 

“That’s something you have to find out for yourself.” 

“Here she is!” Tony exclaimed. “Princess Buttercup… wow, you love dressing her up.” Loki peeked at his phone and was welcomed by a sea of crowned corgis. 

“That is the kind of information you have to keep for yourself.” She said and left without saying goodbye. 

Loki looked from the phone and at Tony’s face. He was focusing on the pictures. 

“Thank you for bringing me here. This was fun.” 

Tony looked at him directly in his icy blue eyes. “Thank you.” He said. “For everything.”


	4. Lost

Loki came into work unsure what to do with Stark – since the fair he’s been a bit distant. Sure, he kept tagging him in memes and sent cute illustrations on Instagram, but every time they spent more than five minutes together (outside of work) Tony’s phone rang and he firmly ignored it. He peeked at the caller ID and whoever Pepper was, she sure wanted to talk to him badly. Tony would see her calling and tense up and the conversation would be ruined. 

Natasha was already at the register serving Jane who, for once, was alone. “Darcy has a cold, she is at home watching Gossip Girl.” She explained to the red-head. Natasha didn’t care, but nodded anyway. Loki greeted them both and started unloading the dishwasher. He still couldn’t believe that Romanoff owned a corgi called Buttercup; that is the kind of information not many people would believe anyway. Once Jane left Natasha started a conversation. 

“See her.” She nodded in the direction of a tall blonde, “she’s been there for 20 minutes now, came asking for Tony.”

Loki looked at her again, was this Pepper? 

“What do you think she wants?” he asked nervously. Natasha picked up on that and raised her eyebrow. “You can’t see it from here, but she is very pregnant.” She loved it when other people had drama; she stayed out of it, but she sure loved observing it. 

Loki was panicking now, a part of him thought this was Tony’s doing. But a larger one hoped that she was not here because of something completely unrelated. Then Steve came by and Natasha dragged him into the conversation.

“What do you think?”

“About what?” he was confused. Pepper was once again pointed out. “The blonde, Rogers.”

“Oh yeah, well she said it was urgent and asked when he will be in for work. I said he should be here in thirty minutes and she said she would wait.”   
Natasha’s eyes lit up. DRAMA. Loki continued panicking. He really hoped that Natasha wouldn’t notice he started to sweat from the nerves.   
Then Tony walked in. He saw Pepper and promptly went out again. He was too late, because she saw him and jumped after him. For a pregnant woman she was very agile. The trio observed through the window as Tony shifted uncomfortably and the woman half shouted at him. They still served costumers, but very distantly. The tone shifted when Tony started replying, and not too calmly. It must have turned into a shouting match as they both gestured wildly and Tony even paced. Natasha wondered what this was about – most likely the baby, after all Tony did start working here only a few months ago – until she saw the tall blonde gesture at her body. You know when you show your palms curtly to say ‘look at this’. 

As Loki saw that it was like all the air ran out of the room. He still maintained hope that his friend was better than this. Tony wouldn’t leave a person in her state.   
Surely. He decided to ask him later, and spend the day praying his suspicions were wrong. 

The argument simmered down and the pair parted ways, the blonde left and Tony entered Starbucks. Natasha and Steve started being very busy, only Loki greeted Tony face to face. Quite sternly. However, he decided not to bring the subject up unless he does. 

“I guess everyone saw that.” Tony more stated than asked. 

“Yes, we did.” Loki replied truthfully and walked away. He was not ready to talk about this, even if he was very eager to know the truth.   
Tony stared at the empty space once occupied by Loki. He turned to talk to Natasha, but she also made herself scarce before he could get a word in. Something was up, the thought, Pepper must have told his co-workers to ignore him until he gives in to her request.   
A good hour passed before Loki could bring himself to properly look at Tony. He seemed the same man as usual, going about in his uniform being nice to customers, his brown hair looking like a brownie. That always made Loki hungry. But now he was hungry because he was angry. It was a strange inclination he had, but he didn’t care. 

“Are you guys angry at me?” Tony suddenly asked. Loki was making a frappucino for the lonely customer and couldn’t pretend to be busy any longer. 

“That depends, did you do something that would make me angry.” He replied cryptically. 

Tony gave the thought a second. “I don’t think so.” He said slowly. 

“Are you sure that there isn’t something you might need to tell me.” Loki asked again. He was pretty sure now that there is something he needed to tell him. At least say why the blonde was here. 

Tony sighed. “It is complicated.” He said and walked away. Loki was not satisfied with the answer, but his shift was ending and Tony had one more hour left. There was no real way for him to annoy the answer out of him. 

Natasha walked up to him. “What did he say?” Loki shrugged. “Not much. Just that it is complicated.” The redhead smiled. “He is so the baby daddy.” 

Loki clearly wasn’t happy with that answer, but gaining that answer involved confronting Tony. He was not a confrontational person, he preferred stewing until it all burst out of him at the worst of times. Maybe this wasn’t a good tactic, he thought, but it will do for now. The tall man clocked out and decided to go for a walk.   
The air outside was crisp and autumnal, the leaves were in various stages of discoloration. Some were red, others were yellow and there were even some green ones mingling with the others. Loki stepped on a small pile with the sole of his well-worn black Doc Martens. He always looked forward to wearing them again, it was the one thing about autumn de did like. Loki wore them today for the first time – the autumn this year had been exceptionally warm; you could still see some brave women wearing flats with no socks – he was going to show them to Tony today. That business with the blonde completely chased the thought from his head. He walked some more, trying to come up with a solution to his problem. His walk already lasted thirty minutes (there was a good deal of observing), so he decided to do some shopping. Maybe a new book would cleanse his soul. Loki went to the large Barnes and Noble that was near his home (thankfully it was a 15-minute walk, so he didn’t always hang out there). He would come there almost regularly and read comic books, fully knowing that was a bad thing to do, so he occasionally bought the ones he really enjoyed. 

Entering the store, he saw all the Halloween merch that was already displayed. He thought of Luna who would let him play dress up for 10 minutes a day. Loki always found it strange how 10 minutes was a very specific number that she had no way of really gauging, and yet she managed anyway. This year he should get her a new costume. 

The Halloween spirit was everywhere – even the bookstore. Next to the generous amount of The Nightmare Before Christmas funkos and Harry Potter journals was a whole wall of Halloween recommendations. Loki realised that he had no plans for it, an oversight on Tony’s part surely. There is nothing as autumnal as Halloween, it is the major event. His hatred for the holiday was small, usually he went to somebody’s party to say hi and disappear soon to go home and watch some of his horror films. Nothing better than that. If Tony forgot, he would remind him. That would give him an entire evening to annoy him into telling him the truth. Failing that, he could always do something very stupid like look at his phone and force him to confront the facts. 

He looked at the books for a moment, but was too anxious to concentrate. He sent a text to Tony instead. 

*the great pumpkin just told me we have no Halloween plans*

Then we walked out of the store and whent home. He was going to google the woman. How many people called Pepper could be there? If the blonde was Pepper. But first he bought a bottle of gin (Bombay Safire, the best one and only one he would drink) and a bottle of tonic to mix the drink. At home he poured some for himself, after greeting Luna of course, and put a shit tone of ice in his glass. He watched an episode of Brooklyn 99 and drank. This was not a thing one should do sober.   
Luna carefully observed the fizzy liquid and the low hissing sound it made. Her human did not usually drink this; she must investigate. 

“Don’t you dare put your paw in there.” Loki warned her. 

He would have taken the glass off the table, but that would mean taking many many sips just because the glass was close, but he wanted to take it slow. Well, fine, he thought, he was procrastinating this. Loki didn’t want to know if his friend was a child-conceiving bastard who then left women to deal with it. But he didn’t picture him this way either. Still, there was doubt and that was more than enough to send him spiralling. He never thought of his ex-boyfriend as horribly manipulative, but he turned out to be a right bastard. He took a long sip of his g&t, Loki decided he was only being cautious. After all, he might not find something.   
The computer was already on the table, inviting him in the crazy. Loki’s hands were shaky and clammy when he opened it. He could barely type as he entered Tony   
Stark girlfriend into Google. There were far too many hits, it made Loki’s head spin. Maybe it was the alcohol. He really hoped it was the alcohol. 

His despair was interrupted by Tony’s reply. 

*it’s true. Wanna go trick or treating?*

*we are adults, Stark. That is weird*

*Kidnap a child*

Loki thought about it. Sif has been complaining about having to take her son trick or treating. If she would allow Loki to usher him about there would be no need for any felonies. 

*There may not be a need for that*

*ooo tell me, do you have a love child from your straight phase?*

Loki observed the irony. Here he was half drunk googling random blondes so that he could determine the existence of Tony’s love child. He didn’t seem to have any issues straight up asking. Perhaps he was being a huge idiot, he thought. 

*no*

*no, I don’t have one or no, I won’t answer that question?*

Loki sighed exasperatedly. This was absolutely ridiculous. He typed angrily. 

*no, I don’t have one. Unlike SOMEONE else I know*

Then he turned off his wi fi and data, left the phone in his living room, and went to his bedroom. It was Loki’s favourite place on Earth. His bedroom was a rather large with a king size bed in the middle. There was a wall covered in books behind it. The majority of books he owned were paperbacks, all well read and torn from being dragged around on random holidays or walks. There were a few funko pops hanging out there as well. He had Mr March from American Horror Story, Tate Langdon and the Rubber man. The countess (more AHS). Unmasked Kylo Ren, Revenge era Gerard Way and The Black Parade Gerard. General Hux was his living room centrepiece. Loki was about 5 dolls away from admitting he had a problem. 

He walked to the dresser and took out new PJs – tartan bottoms and a plain black t shirt. Loki might have been on the tipsy side, but he was determined to enjoy his evening (well, night since he didn’t need to go to work tomorrow). First thing he did was to run a bubble bath and read his book. For some reason he was re-discovered the Lethbridge-Stewart books. Well, the books were new, but he vaguely remembered listening to the radio shows. As a child, he used to have a crush on Anne Travers. In retrospect, he just admired her smarts and the ability to stand up for herself. Last week he went overboard on book depository and ordered all 7 of the books. He was on book three now and completely hooked. The stories were even better than he remembered them. After his bath, Loki brushed his teeth and went to bed where he watched Brooklyn 99. He fell asleep during the second episode, all thought of Tony chased away from his head. 

Tony was turning in his bed. Unlike Loki he couldn’t sleep. He wasn’t answering his texts or calls. The last text he received was so strangely vague. Was it shade throwing? Or was Loki just trying to gossip but fell asleep? Either way, Tony couldn’t shake off a feeling that Loki was mad at him. The problem was that he couldn’t think of a reason why he would be mad. At 3 am, he abandoned all hope of having a good night’s sleep and got up. He made himself a nice cup of tea and watched Brooklyn 99 to cheer him up. Tony even lit a candle to make the ambiance a bit less ‘I can’t sleep so here is some artificial light’ and more ‘cosy evening of treat yo self’. At 5 am, Tony was asleep on the couch a mere minute after he turned off Netflix and blew out the candle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are. it's time for hopefully unintruvsive and non-frustrating unnecessary drama. Forgive me if it's too evil. Is it just me or did Natasha become very mean lately? No idea how that happened. 
> 
> Also I've been thinking about the next writing project and so far I have two ideas: 
> 
> 1) Scream Queens crossover (season 1, Loki is Chanel Oberlin). Could be fun.   
> 2) Have you ever read that prompt where a villain and a hero live together but don't realise who each other is? That, but more au-modern world. And they would be a couple. 
> 
> And please let me know if you would like to see some one shots from the same story; maybe some Darcy and Jane chapters or Natasha and Bucky.


	5. Pumpkin Pie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I was away and I didn't have my computer with me.   
> Next chapter will be the super seasonally appropriate Halloween trick or treating. But at least things will be steaming up!!

Loki woke up at 10 am. It was the best night’s sleep he had in a while. For once he woke up rested and completely naturally – instead of being rudely awoken by an alarm clock. Out of habit he reached for his phone. He could feel his alarm clock on the nightstand, but no phone. 

“Right.” Loki remembered leaving it in his living room. He had no wish to deal with that situation. But he was feeling really anxious about it at the same time. Loki groaned and threw the duvet off him. Once exposed, he got up and went to the living room. 

He had 7 texts and 4 missed calls from Tony. Great, he though, now I really have to deal with that. 

With a simple swipe right Loki’s phone called Tony back. He was too lazy to hold it, so he put his friend on speaker. It rang for a while. Loki just sat there holding out his phone. He was about to end it (oh well, at least I tried, he thought relieved) when he heard a noise. 

“Loki?” 

“Sorry, I fell asleep after sending that.” He lied. “I had a bit too much to drink.” There was silence on the other end. 

“Sorry, I will wake up properly soon.” His friend assured him. “Can you just explain what that was all about? It makes no sense for you to be this cryptic.” Loki’s stomach gurgled. 

“Can we not do this over the phone? What if we meet somewhere for breakfast?”

“Oh my god, yes food, thank you. I’ll text you the address of my fave brunch place. Byeeeeee.” He hung up on Loki. The tall man was confused by the sudden dismissal, but true to Tony’s word, he received an address. He sighed and got dressed. 

In his bed, Tony was panicking. At least he was resolving whatever was happening. He could remember the days when he just cut people out; literally hello/bye, never going to see you again. The millionaire wanted Loki to stick around for longer than that. Much longer. 

Loki was still looking for a good way to phrase his question, when he arrived at the brunch place. He could see his friend sitting at one of the tables right by the window. The autumn mist was clearing, and it looked like it will soon be sunny, but for now it was terrible and grey. Loki took a deep breath and entered. 

“I ordered you a white americano. Hope that’s ok.” Tony explained as Loki was getting himself settled. 

“That’s great, thank you.”

“So, what was –”

“Why do you never answer Pepper’s calls? Was the woman we saw Pepper? Did you knock her up?” Loki couldn’t stop himself from asking all the questions he wanted.   
He really wished he found a better way of asking – the look on Tony’s face was that of utter bewilderment. 

“Because they are always serious, and I hate serious. Yes, that’s Pepper. And no. apparently, it was a very handsome rugby player.” 

Loki looked relieved to Tony. “Thank god.”

“Wait. Do you think … that it was my baby?” Tony was confused and more than a bit hurt. 

“No.” Loki defended himself. “Well, yes. At first, I thought against it, and the I started doubting it. Natasha had a lot to say on the subject.” Loki took a sip. Tony   
continued being hurt. “Look, my ex was a total ash hole and I couldn’t see it coming and he ruined my life. When this happened, I really hoped you were the person I thought you to be, AND you are. So that is good. Please don’t be too mad.” 

Tony considered this. He did ask him outright, after sulking and subtexting him. 

“I appreciate your honesty. And I am grateful you asked me, instead of sneaking around trying to find out.” Loki recalled last night’s adventure. He was really glad it didn’t go any further than ‘Tony Stark girlfriend’. 

“But I can’t just not be hurt that you thought there was a possibility I would just run away from such a life-changing problem.”   
Loki raised his eyebrow when he heard problem. 

“Poor word choice, I agree.” 

“So, what did she want?” Loki asked. 

It was Tony’s turn to sigh. “As you saw, she is having a baby. Essentially, she would like me to be CEO while she is gone. Says she doesn’t trust anyone else to take care of my company. I told her she was being ridiculous, I have like zero experience. When I did work, I was mostly in R&D. I miss that, but I would make a shitty CEO.”   
Loki was stunned. This was far from what he expected. Truthfully, he never tried to find other reasons why she would wish to talk to his friend; he was too obsessed with the paternity question. 

“Pepper must think otherwise, or she wouldn’t have asked you.” Loki replied. 

Tony took a big sip of his coffee and looked out of the window. Outside was a tree with many bright leaves, although more were on the ground than on the branches. More were falling down every minute, as it was quite breezy today. Unbeknownst to Loki and Tony it would begin to rain soon. Tony observed the falling leaves while Loki observed him. 

“But that would mean quitting my job.” He finally said quietly. 

“You could ask Bucky to put it on hold??” Loki said unconvincingly. He did not have much experience with returning to the same workplace. “Ask first, see what he says. If that is your only concern.” 

“I also don’t have a good track record of keeping up with friends when I don’t see them regularly. I mean, Pepper and Happy make a great effort to chase me down … but I am not the greatest at chasing people. I just sorta… give up.” 

“I see. I’ll annoy you as much as humanly possible then.” 

“That is if I do take Pepper’s offer.” Tony interjected. 

Loki gave him a stern look. “You will call her right now and say, ‘yes Pepper, I will be a good friend and take care of MY company while you enjoy your baby’.” Tony tried to interrupt him, but Loki was having none of it. He took Tony’s phone that was conveniently placed by his coffee and shoved it in Tony’s hands. The future CEO was waiting for Pepper to pick up as their food arrived. Loki got an omelette with mushrooms and peppers, the sensible adult choice. Tony opted for blueberry pancakes with maple syrup. Instead of eating, Loki continued staring at Tony that was now saying the previously prepared line to Pepper.   
Tony was scared at the responsibility he will have to have, but glad that Loki made the decision for him. He was right, he though, two intelligent people couldn’t be wrong about this. It will be all ok. Tony said goodbye to Pepper for one last time and then started eating his pancakes. 

The rain was coming down hard. Loki was happy it was raining, it had been far too dry in the last two weeks. That and he wasn’t due at work today, so he could spend the day reading while it rained. For a moment he was worried, but he remembered the emergency umbrella in his bag and was calm again. 

“I think I should go as Batman.” Tony broke the silence. 

“Go where?” Loki asked, all confused. 

“Trick of treating. I hope you know what that is, since you mentioned it was a possibility, strange for a person hating autumn. It is the peak of it.” 

“No, it’s the end. On November first, at midnight, it is time for Christmas and that is what I live for.” 

“Not a fan.” Tony said. 

Loki stared incredulously. “You love autumn and Halloween, but HATE Christmas?! How is that possible.” 

“I just do.” He shrugged. 

Loki considered this. “I don’t think Batman is such a good idea.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll think of something.” He was almost finished with his food – and there was plenty of pancakes. He was given a massive stack. Loki, on the other hand, was a very slow eater no matter the quantity of food. 

“What shit weather” Tony suddenly said. Loki gave him a strange look. 

“Are we really going to talk about the weather?”

“I though British people loved talking about the weather.” He defended himself. 

“We just love complaining. Weather is an easy target.” 

“Here’s a complaint then; I don’t have an umbrella, so I will have to make a run for it.” Tony looked out of the window. The rain was pouring down so hard it was bouncing up on impact. Even if you had an umbrella, it would only really protect a bit of your face. 

“I have one. I’ll walk you home.” 

Tony looked very relieved. “You are such a kind person, I should buy you something very large. Like the moon.” Loki raised his eyebrows. “Too big, I agree.” Tony continued, “a large diamond? A car?” 

“Just pay for the breakfast and shut up.” 

“Rude.” Tony mock shamed him, but he still paid the bill. 

The umbrella Loki had with him was much too small for him, let alone two people. He gave up hope on protecting his Cambridge satchel five minutes ago, but there was a part of his face that was not wet and that seemed like a good enough goal. Tony was not doing much better. Since Loki was taller he was holding the umbrella, meaning Tony was only partially protected for the rain. It was better than nothing, but the pair proceeded slowly and not without much squabbling. 

“I can’t let you walk home in this rain, just stay at my place.” Tony begged. 

“Really, I’d much rather be at home. Have a bath and read.” 

“I have both of those things at home.” 

“I doubt you have the book I was reading.” Normally Loki would have taken up the offer, but he really wanted some peace and quiet. Sometimes you just need to retreat   
from the world, even if the world is your friend. 

“Try me.”

“Fine. It’s The Beast of Fang Rock.” Loki said and hoped his choice was strange enough for him. The rain was abating, but he could feel the hair sticking to his face. He really hoped he wouldn’t end up with a cold. 

“Ok, I don’t have that book, but I do have the DVD of Horror of Fang Rock. And a tv that works in the bathroom.” 

“It’s four episodes.” Loki reasoned. 

“So? I have two bathrooms, I can pee somewhere else. Besides I have work later, so you’ll be alone.” 

“Fine.” 

“So, you’re a sucker for classic Doctor Who.” Tony smiled. “Me too.” 

“Maybe, I am just very cold.” He really was, Loki could feel himself shiver with every step he took, and he could hear some teeth-clacking when Tony talked. 

“Same.”

Tony was true to his word, the only time he interrupted Loki was when he brought him a steaming cup of tea. He could get used to this, he though, as he sipped his tea and watched Doctor Who in the tub. Why does Tony ever leave the apartment? After an hour Loki was feeling restless. His skin was pruning, and the water was almost cold. Loki got out of the bath and hoped that he would be able to turn off the dvd. As he was drying himself he contemplated doing something nice for Tony – after all he did interrogate, offend and possibly abuse his hospitality all in one day. He looked out the window, it was still raining, but much less aggressively. Loki had no wish to leave the apartment, he considered this for a moment and decided that to put his comfort first. Feeling guilty for a second, he thought he could always leave if Stark seemed to be too annoyed when he was him. 

Loki heard the opening notes to Jump the gun (by Adore Delano, yes he enjoyed drag race and has no regrets about it) and realised his phone was ringing. Tony was calling him. 

“Hi, Loks, I just want to know if you are still in my apartment?” Loki could hear background noise – Natasha and Darcy yelling obscenities mostly. 

“Yes, I just got out of the bath.” He said, “I hope that’s ok with you?” he asked tentatively. 

“I forgot to give you the spare keys and since I have no idea where they are, I couldn’t even give them to you in the first place. Anyway, can you just wait for me? If you can’t that is ok too, I just am not too comfortable letting my place be unlocked.” 

“Nah, that’s fine, I’ll wait.” 

“Awesome! There is food in the fridge if you want anything. I’ll be back at 7. Byeeee.” Tony left no time for Loki to respond. He was glad that he got away with lounging so easily. Someone up there was being kind. 

Loki found some clothes laid out for him by the towels and got dressed. It took him three tries to find the right remote to turn off the DVD, but he did it. Then he went around the apartment (fine, he was lost and kept finding new rooms instead of the useful ones, like the living room) until he finally got the kitchen. He knew it was a bad idea, but he couldn’t resist going through the cupboards. The first one he opened contained tea – more tea than he had ever seen before. The tall man was very happy to see it was mostly loose-leafed, that is the right way to have tea according to him. For a caffeinated person like Tony it was unusual to have so much tea, and even stranger, it was mostly green tea. At least that was his thinking until he opened the cupboard next to it and found 17 bags of coffee. So much for a chill drinker. He continued his kitchen raid and considered baking something. He found a sufficient amount of eggs in the fridge, and there was a fully equipped spice rack. However,   
Tony didn’t have any apples or enough chocolate so both muffins and pie were out of the question. He dug deeper and found a can of pumpkin puree. 

“Hello my old nemesis. You have come back.” Loki said out loud with a strange Spanish accent. Loki made quite a few pumpkin pies in his days – at home he was the designated dessert baker – but hasn’t baked one for three years. He considered it. On the one hand, it was a reminder of his family, on the other it was delicious and on the third he was too lazy to make his own crust. Loki sighed and checked the freezer. Tony did indeed hide a pre-made crust. There was no escaping this. 

“Easy peasy pumpkin peasy, pumpkin pie motherfucker. It’s baking time.” 

Loki turned on the radio and defrosted the pastry in the microwave. He dug out a mould (why did Stark seem to have everything in his kitchen, but used nothing, he thought) and preheated the oven. Loki was so used to making pumpkin pie he found that he still didn’t need the recipe. He was used to magically producing 6 of those every year. As the pie was baking he tried to find his way back to the library he saw earlier. 

In Loki’s mind there were few private libraries as impressive as Tony’s. He seemed to have every genre imaginable. He knew that because someone had put little metal plates announcing the genres on the shelves. There were plenty of those – up to the ceiling plenty. Tony even had a ladder to get to those hard to reach books. In addition to more books than a person could read in a lifetime, there was a work desk that showed clear signs of still being in use. It was very large and a beautiful shade of brown. Loki stroked it lovingly and then turned back to the books. He always gravitated towards science fiction, but enjoyed so called ‘serious’ fiction too. Any book has the potential to be good and serious no matter the genre. He was perusing the science fiction corner (Loki loved that Tony organised books by size. The only right way to do it in Loki’s mind). When a very large book attracted his attention. Loki always loved big books, it took a while to read them, but he was in no rush. It was Jerusalem by Alan Moore. Loki pursed his lips. If he started it now, he would have to borrow it or buy a copy of his own, but he wanted to read the book because Alan Moore. He was a bit surprised he didn’t own the book already. The black-haired man took the book from the self and went back to the kitchen. He was cold and wanted a cup of coffee.

Leaning on the counter Loki was calmly reading Jerusalem and sipping his coffee. It was very hot despite the large amount of milk he put in. Loki was feeling very calm and content. The rain was still falling and thanks to the pie baking the kitchen was warm and smelt like pie and cinnamon. Loki thought about snapping a picture of it to Tony but decided against it. After the timer went off Loki put the pie out of the oven and went back to the library where he lost himself in the book. 

“Honey, I’m home!” Tony called out when he finally made it back. The rain slowed everything down and made getting home a real challenge. Tony looked around – the living room looked the same as when he left. He panicked, maybe Loki did leave after all. He kept on walking and calling for Loki. 

“Helloooo, anyone here? Uuu a pie.” Tony stopped in his tracks – the kitchen was spotless and yet there was a pumpkin pie waiting to be eaten. Loki must have made it. “Damn that talented man.” Tony murmured. He continued looking for the pie-baking-hiding man. He checked the library next. 

“Welp, nothing here.” Tony said aloud. “I really should stop talking to myself. Such a bad habit, Tony.” He was going to continue rambling when he saw a mug placed by his favourite chair. Tony really hoped that Loki didn’t hear him talk aloud and then berate himself for doing so… aloud. His wish came true since Loki was asleep on the chair, the book in his lap and his hands on the book. There was some drool coming out the side of his mouth. Tony planned to tease him about it relentlessly. He contemplated the best way to wake him up and settled for light poking. 

“Staph.” Loki said after ten or so pokes, and shifted in the chair. 

“Why should I?” Tony teased some more. 

“I made you a pie, you ungrateful bastard.” Loki struggled to fully open his eyes, I mean he was juts rudely awakened. 

“I saw and it is beautiful.” He poked Loki two more times. 

“I am awake.” Loki protested and used the book as a shield. Tony changed his attack and started tickling. “NO!” Loki cried, but it was too late, Tony was a seasoned tickler and he made Loki laugh so hard tears were streaming out of his eyes, and then finally he fell out of his chair. 

“Rude.” He said with a surprising amount of dignity. 

“Sure.” Tony agreed and changed the subject, “Let’s have that pie now.”   
 


	6. Halloween (finally)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are! One chapter away from the end. I will be doing some more one shot fics from this au, but the real project will be a *drum roll* A MURDER MYSTERY! Because we all need some detective Loki in our lives

“I just think that Halloween is a great excuse to dress up as ridiculously as possible. I LOVE makeup and this is MY night to do some over the top stuff.” Natasha considered that this was the first truly interesting thing Darcy ever said. At least in her opinion, Steve seemed to like her a lot. 

“Morning Darcy.” Tony greeted her, “You dressing up tonight?” He asked unaware that Natasha was just given a five-minute lecture on her costume. 

“YES. I was just telling Natasha – I am going as a zombie mermaid. Jane is going as a fisherman. She killed me. We have a whole backstory planned. I was CALMLY swimming when I saw her and was like BAM that is the first FUCKABLE sailor I’ve seen. SO I get close and THEN she sweet talks me and all, but she’s actually EVIL and when I get close to her to kiss her she STABS ME. So mean. And then she takes my body and tries to sell it to a museum for BIG MONEY but nope, when I dry my fin disappears, and she is like OH SHIT here goes my money, so she dumps me back in the water (a different place obvi) and then a sea witch finds me and revives me and I WOW TO TAKE REVENGE.” 

Natasha seemed exasperated to Tony. “Would you like to order or have you come to tell me the story?” Normally she wasn’t as rude as this, but she was extra cranky today because her sister dumped her kid on her. She was supposed to watch Friday the 13th and get that sweet d, but then her sister called and just assumed she wasn’t busy. Now Bucky and she were stuck on babysitting duty so her sister can go out and be her normal thot self. She would be supportive, she was the last person to slut shame anyone, but she was pissed off that her sister just assumed she had nothing to do. Natasha was going to make sure that she sees a half-naked Bucky when she comes back next morning to get her kid. Her reaction was the only thing motivating her at the moment. 

“Rude.” Said Darcy, “I have come to bring some joy in this cold day. And order one of those zombie fraps.” Tony smiled and left Natasha to make it.

“Are you going out too?” Darcy asked. “Yes!” Tony lit up. “Loki and I have commandeered a small child and we are going trick or treating. He says we are entitled to a third of the profit.” Tony started serving the next customer, but continued his conversation with Darcy. She may not be the highlight of Tasha’s day, but she was his. 

“Daymn, you and Dracula keep hanging out.” Darcy said. She wasn’t sure what she meant by that. 

“Yes, well we are experiencing autumnal stuff together.” Tony served another customer. 

“Besides, he’s not as scary as he seems.” He continued, and Darcy nodded in agreement. 

“Do you promise to take pictures of him all dressed up and show them to me later?” She said as if it was the most important things ever. Which it totally was in her opinion. 

“Darcy, I would consider it an honour.” Tony said solemnly. By then Natasha came back with a disgusting-looking frap (in a good way) and Darcy understood it was her cue to leave. 

Loki cursed as he tried to pull his long hair backwards. It wasn’t technically long hair, Darcy loved to joke he had the bisexual haircut, which was ironic in itself, as both were gay. Either way, his hair had enough of a temper to battle his intention to slick them back. He guessed it will have to do, since Tony was due to arrive any minute. In the living room, his godson was watching Adventure Time while sulking. Apparently, it was the height of torture to not allow a hyperactive child to have candy BEFORE going to get more candy. Evan, the godson, was even more insulted when he found out that a third of his candy will be given away to Loki. He would have cared more, but Evan was dressed as Toad and it was hard to take him seriously looking like a giant mushroom. 

“Are you ready?” Loki asked the sad mushroom as he gathered his wallet and keys. The mushroom shrugged. He guessed that tonight would be fun, Loki could be fun if he wanted to. Always let him watch the bloody stuff on TV. 

Tony was early. Normally, it wouldn’t bother him, but he stayed in the car for those extra 10 minutes in case Loki needed more time to dress up. That was a lie – he was terribly nervous. The air between them has been cleared, a very good pie was baked, and last night, as he had trouble sleeping Tony realised something very important. He hoped that he would have time to tell this to Loki, but mainly he feared his reaction. Luckily there would be a small child between them to keep him from saying things that maybe should never be said. He took a deep breath and exited the car. On his way to the apartment Tony continuously murmured to himself   
“it will all be ok, it will all work out” to himself. Perhaps it was working, as he was much less nervous when he knocked on Loki’s door. 

They opened swiftly and Loki exclaimed without greeting his friend: “Thank god you are here, the mushroom has been too sad to believe!!” 

Tony would have replied, but he was too stunned to even hear the words. Loki was dressed as a VAMPIRE. He had a black suit with a black shirt and tie. And a cape. Oh, god, there was a cape. He looked every inch the dapper undead lord of vampires. Loki didn’t stop at the cape – he had smudged red lipstick and an even paler complexion. 

“You’re a vampire.” He said. 

Loki was surprised at Tony’s costume too – there seemed to be a common theme; both had their hair slicked back. However, that wasn’t was shocked Loki the most. Tony was also in a suit except his was pearly grey and he wore sunglasses. For Halloween, the most excited of people, looked like himself but slightly better. 

“Dracula actually. Darcy keeps calling me that, so I just went with it.” He paused for a second, “what are you supposed to be?” He asked. 

“That’s easy, Bruce Wayne.” He said and smiled. 

“Oh” Loki said and let him in. “This is Evan, my godson.” Loki pointed at the small child standing by the dresser next to the entrance. 

“Can we go NOW.” Evan asked, clearly fed up with everything. He didn’t wait for a reply, but went past Tony who called after him: “You are clearly very well behaved.” Loki snickered. 

“Normally he is a nice child.” He defended him. 

“I am sure he is.” Tony left him no chance for another rebuttal and went after Evan. Loki checked his reflection for the last time and then joined Tony and Evan who were already by the elevator. 

“Evan says we are going to his street.” He informed Loki. 

“He’s right. There is lots of houses ready for small rude children.” He gave Evan a look. “It’s not that far, but we do need your car.” Loki’s voice got higher as he neared the end of the sentence. “I forgot to ask you.” 

“Nah, that’s fine.” Tony slightly panicked – the car ride prolonged his time with Loki and more time meant more opportunities for saying stupid things. 

“Great.” Loki said as they headed for the car. “By the way, another thing I forgot to say, we should be done relatively early, so I thought we could go back to mine and watch a Giallo film.”

“A what?” Tony asked. His taste in films was eclectic, but he refrained from foreign films. Not because of the subtitles, but they made him too sad.

“Italian horror crime. It’s like a gory detective story.” Loki explained. “Because needless violence is fun on Halloween.” He turned to Evan, “don’t tell your mother I said   
that.”

While on their way to Evan’s street, Tony tried to pass the time by asking him as many questions as possible. The small child was traditionally unresponsive, as he belonged to those people that magically shut up as soon as their butts touch a car seat. Therefore, it was up to Loki to answer for him. Tony gave a valiant effort, asking questions for full 15 minutes before giving up. Loki smiled at him fondly. The night was going better than he expected. 

“What?” Tony asked. 

“Nothing.” 

“My mum told me to ask you if you have a boyfriend yet.” Evan pronounced out of the blue completely dead pan. He couldn’t care less. 

Loki blushed and Tony averted his eyes from him. 

“No, I don’t. And tell her, she can find out things like that herself.” 

The rest of the drive was Loki and Tony quietly chit chatted about their co-workers. Mostly Tony complained how rude Natasha was being lately. It wasn’t really chit chatting. Tony was venting and Loki listened attentively. He loved it when people vented. 

“I am telling you she crossed a line from being a mischievous being to a full-on revenge of the barista. Especially towards Darcy who has done nothing to deserve her ire.” 

“We’re here.” Evan spoke again. Tony wondered if he expected him to say ‘trick or treat’ for him or would he do that himself. But he dismissed that thought as overly critical. After all, he was just a small child he barely knew. 

“We’re going to look like gay parents, won’t we.” Loki said as the trio went towards the first house. “I really did not think this through.” 

Tony panicked, what was he supposed to say to that. What a shame? Gay people are allowed to have children too, right. It wouldn’t be the most horrible thing to be in a relationship with him. He could be a good boyfriend. Before he could finish panicking, Loki answered himself. 

“Oh well, at least I will know which neighbours to hate.” 

For the first time that evening Evan said something actually useful. “Oh, I already know which ones we hate. Mum said we have to go to their houses first.” 

“Brilliant!” Loki lit up. He turned to his companion. 

“Tony, pretend to be my boyfriend. We’ll really freak them out.” 

Tony struggled to speak normally, but he still sensed some shakiness in his voice. 

“Okay, freaking out some homophobes. I can do that.” He really hoped he came out nonchalant, but he probably just seemed disinterested. 

Loki didn’t notice, he was already heading towards the first house Evan pointed out. 

“This is what we are going to do. Tony, you hold my hand and when they give out candy make sure that they see it. If they seem really distressed go for a hug or something even more disgusting.” Loki air quoted the last word. 

Tony swallowed hard. He didn’t really want to pretend to be Loki’s boyfriend – he wanted to be his bf. This was a new step in their friendship, but for Tony it decidedly pointed in a friend direction. 

“You alright?” Loki asked when he didn’t respond. The door opened and Tony panicked as a picture of suburban motherhood opened the door. If there ever was a person to be homophobic (and possibly racist), it looked like her. She was carrying a large bowl of assorted candy and started greeting Evan. 

“Hi, sugar. You want some candy?” She asked with a slight southern twang. 

Loki gave Tony a pointed look urging him to do something. Tony’s mind went blank with panic. He grabbed Loki’s hand and started at him. Tony had no idea if Loki’s plan worked, he was focusing too hard on breathing normally. 

“C’mon let’s go!” Evan urged them. Tony followed the kid, only Loki glanced back and saw the woman’s hard grip on the candy bowl. At least something was going ok, even if Tony has been acting weird. 

“You don’t have to do this, if you don’t want to.” Loki said to him. 

Tony mentally slapped himself and tried to establish contact with reality again. 

“Nah, it’s ok. Freaking out homophobes. I feel useful, isn’t Halloween all about being scared?” he asked unconvincingly. 

Loki hummed unconvinced at his words. 

“Really, I am ok.” Tony tried again. 

The arrived at the next house. This time Tony rang the bell and then put his arm around Loki’s shoulder. 

Loki looked at him. “Well, this should be interesting.” 

The trio stood there like a picture of happy family, if that family was composed of Toad, Dracula and Bruce Wayne. Tony could feel Loki’s breathing under his hand. If he felt at least a bit uncomfortable, that was nowhere close to the expressions of discomfort the person opening the door showed. 

His face went bright red. For a moment he considered saying something, but Tony and Loki stood there with a confident smile on their faces saying ‘I dare you to do something, I really do.’ Even Evan gave him his best gleam. When offered candy silently he made sure to take an extra large amount. The whole exchange was made in silence and marked by extreme tension. 

“Mum says the next house is the worst.” Evan said as soon as the doors closed. At much the same time Tony also removed his arm from Loki with such a rapid movement he nearly punched him as Loki moved to descend the stairs. 

“Sorry!” He said and once again hoped he wasn’t acting too weird. Loki gave him a look. This was clearly a mistake. However, he had a hard time determining what part of the evening was the real mistake – coming here or asking him to freak some people out. 

Loki ignored his apology and turned to Evan. 

“How come?”

“Two girls live in that house” Evan pointed at one of two dark houses, “and when they first moved in they tried to get them to move. They spray painted their house red with bad words.” He stated. “I don’t like them, so mean.” Evan said decidedly. Loki beamed, his grandson was definitely being raised right. 

“So, you would say that they need something extra mean?” He said and donned his thinking face. Tony tried to imitate him, but his mind was drawing a blank. Well, there was one thing that was on his mind, but he doubted that Loki would approve. 

“Can I fake propose to you?” Loki asked, but immediately answered himself. “No, that would be too much.” 

“Fake break up?” He pondered. “Definitely dramatic, but they might be pleased with that outcome.” 

A group of children came by them and dragged Evan with them, stripping Loki of opportunity to think of an effective plan. He seemed confused for a second and let Tony take his hand and follow the stream of children. Tony would have been much more amused at the sight of a confused Dracula, let alone confused Loki, but he was too nervous to appreciate it. He had a plan and that plan could quite possibly lead to an evening of silence or worse a ruptured friendship. 

Loki opened his mouth to protest but instead heard a crowd of children yell about candy. He closed his eyes to regain his composure. A male voice interrupted the chatter. 

“You can all have all the candy you want. EXCEPT for the sinner’s child.” He glared at Evan and then glared at Loki who was still holding Tony’s hand. 

“EXCUSE me?! What did you call MY boyfriend.” Tony erupted. He was still hazy on the sinner’s child part, but he was ready to fight anyone. 

“A man shall not lie with a man, it is an abomination.” He stated and emptied the candy bowl into the closest child’s bag while holding eye contact with Tony.   
Loki knew he should intervene, but he was too interested by what might happen next. 

“That attitude is an abomination.” Tony yelled confidently, knowing that his argument could be supported much better. “As is that shirt. I should know I spent a lot of time in the closet.” He said feeling kinda proud. Even if it wasn’t true. 

The children were quiet in response to the tension that was happening. Evan was trying to remember every detail, so he could recount it later to his mum. 

“With a suit like that I don’t doubt it.” The neighbour replied. Then his wife came from the house. Tony was thinking of insults that did not involve the word fuck, there   
were children present. He had no wish to add ‘child corrupter’ to his list of offenses, regardless of what the homophobic population thought of gay people. 

Loki’s mind gathered momentum again. He could think clearly. They were in a bad situation that he intentionally provoked, but in reality should have never happened. He knew that Sif would have no problem if he murdered the evil neighbours, but he had no wish to spend his life in jail, no matter the goodness of the cause. He settled for a less aggressive course of action. He released Tony’s hand, turned his face towards his and planted a kiss on his lips. 

Tony was panicking, he had the very same idea 5 minutes ago, but he wasn’t going to follow through really. But finally kissing Loki felt great, not just because he had some very soft lips but because he was aware it was LOKI. 

It was over before he knew it. Tony fought the instinct to lean back in for another one. 

“Were you traumatised?” Loki addressed the children who were staring. They all shook their heads. 

“Then fuck you.” Loki said at the couple who were fuming. He took Evan’s and Tony’s hand and dragged them away taking long steps. They soon arrived at Evan’s house and Loki confidently marched in and located a stunned Sif who was soaking herself in a bathtub. 

“Jesus, Loki you can’t just barge in.” She said and used a towel to cover herself. 

“I offended your neighbours and now I am giving you back Evan. Mostly because offending them was a bad idea and I should have waited until later in the evening because I don’t actually have the balls to walk around after I KISSED my friend and then insulted them in front a bunch of small children. I’m sorry.” He said and exited the bathroom. 

Loki dragged Tony outside again before he had the chance to do or say anything. Tony himself was stunned at his inability to speak. He always had so many words at his disposal and now, when it counted he had none. 

For the first time in their friendship, the silence was decidedly uncomfortable. Tony kept thinking of the ways he could bring up the kiss. Loki was doing a similar thing in his head – he berated himself for being such an idiot to do it in the first place. 

“About the kiss…” Loki started. 

“Can we please talk about that?” Tony asked relieved. He didn’t wait for the answer so the two spoke at the same time. 

“I want you to do it again.” Tony said quickly before the words would be eaten up by his mumbling. 

“It was a mist—” Loki didn’t conclude his sentence upon hearing what Tony had to say. 

“You want me to kiss you again?” He asked unsure if he heard correctly. 

“Yes.” Tony replied. Loki was going to ask some follow up questions, but he was beaten by Tony’s explanation. 

“I like you. Not like as a friend, well I do, you’re a great friend, but I also like you… like like you. I, I, I want to take you out and see where that goes because you really are very pretty.” 

Loki blushed when called pretty, it wasn’t a word he heard that often. Boys usually aren’t pretty or cute. The light at the stop turned red. Instead of answering immediately, Loki gave a much nicer and less rushed kiss to Tony. It was just right, like the last kiss was. 

“I am very glad I asked you to come watch a movie.” He said and kissed the top of Tony’s nose where a red mark joined the smear on his lips. 

“For the record, that means I like you too right?” Tony asked nervously. 

“Yes. Take me on a date, make an honest woman out of me.” Loki laughed and looked at Tony. He never noticed when he put on love googles, but he sure was glad he had them on now because Tony looked like the softest boy ever to him and his heart was ready to burst at the thought that this boy thought the same back.


	7. November 1st

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Than you for waiting!
> 
> Here it is, the final chapter! There Will probably be a part two, not sure when but I am definitely not ready to say bye to these two. 
> 
> PS: to any romance novel fans - sorry for trash talking. And if you are intrigued by the blurbs - they are all from a Goodreads list on REAL bodice rippers.

Loki stared at a sleeping Tony. He knew he was being a creep, but Tony seemed so relaxed when he slept, it was hard not to watch. The frown on his forehead relaxed and Loki could see the faint lines where the skin creased. 

After his confession Tony took Loki back to his apartment. He behaved like a perfect gentleman and only occasionally stole a kiss. That was while he drove, the film was a cuddling extravaganza of unmatchable proportions. Loki would have been nauseated at the sight of them, he hated PDA with a passion, but they were home alone and Loki’s blanket was supremely snuggly. The tall man was glad that he finally got the opportunity to be the big spoon. He blushed at the memory of him playing with Tony’s hair (11/10 would do again) far more than actually watching the film, despite it being his favourite. Tony, on the other hand was not to be outdone. He, in turn, also gave too much attention to Loki’s right hand and mostly observed what he described as ‘a daddy’s long fingers and emo aesthetic perfection’. All Loki did was paint his nails black. 

He took a sip of his coffee and went back to the living room to read in silence. It was still early and Loki did not expect to see his mother for another couple of hours. It occurred to him that he had no idea how long Tony normally slept. For all he knew he might be a morning person, that is, against all evidence presented so far. At least they were both night owls who functioned with an alarmingly small amount of sleep. 

“Morning.” Tony yawned as he saw the already dressed Loki reading on the couch. He was still groggy from sleep, but nevertheless mentally congratulated himself on not taking the duvet and cocooning himself in it, as he normally did. 

“Morning.” Loki smiled at him. The brunet’s hair was sticking up in a giant mess, but that did nothing to diminish his cuteness, if anything it increased it. If nothing   
else, he could finally admire his biceps unashamedly. Those things looked like they were carved out of marble. 

“Still can’t believe you don’t actually own sweatpants.” Tony said. It was an odd thing to say first thing in the morning, but his mind was still starting. 

“Why would I? Leggings are so much better, I can pretend to be a ninja as I walk around my apartment.” 

“You are entirely correct and I need them now.” Tony replied, sold on the idea as soon as he heard ninja. 

“So, my mother is coming today, don’t know when, and I am not throwing you out, just giving you heads up if the bell is ringing and you don’t know what is going on.” Loki cringed as soon as he finished the sentence, he knew he phrased it very badly. 

“Why is your mother coming?” Tony asked and sat down next to Loki. 

“It’s November 1st.” Loki stated as if Tony knew what that meant. 

“And…” Tony did not see the significance of the date, other than it being the day you can start thinking about Christmas. 

“Discounted Halloween candy.” Loki said, leaning into Tony and giving him a peck on the cheek. “All the chocolate you could wish for, just waiting for you at Target.” 

“Your mother is a smart woman.”

“She really is.” He agreed. “You hungry?” Loki suddenly remembered.

“Aww yesss.” Tony got excited. He wondered what Loki normally ate. “Awesome. I made overnight oats.” Loki said excitedly. Tony panicked. Porridge was not his idea of a great breakfast. “It’s going to be great trust me.” 

“If you say so. Anything from your pretty hands should be pretty darn good.” He paused for a second and stood up. “I am going to get dressed.” He announced and left. 

Loki was right, porridge was exciting breakfast. It turned out that overnight oats meant strawberries, chia seeds, yogurt, milk, peanut butter, bananas and only then oats. Tony could feel his inner white girl die of excitement. 

“I think that you should let Luna decide what to post next.” Tony defended his case. 

“And how am I supposed to do that?” Loki asked, “put papers on the ground and see which one she doesn’t eat?” He was warming up to the idea of allowing Luna to choose what to post on Instagram next, even if it sounded ridiculous. 

“Yes, exactly that. Make it a cat-human democracy, not a dictatorship.” Loki snorted. “Have you ever had a cat? They own you, not the other way around.” 

“Well, no but I imagined it to be cuddly.” Tony petted his imaginary cat while Loki looked very sceptical. “Yeah, well Luna and I are so cuddly, she had yet to come to say good morning to me. Other than her normal begging for food, she has ignored both of us.” 

“I can dream.” 

The bell rang. Tony hoped to leave before Loki’s mother arrived – not because he was rude, but this was a one night old relationship. It was a bit early to meet the family. That and this was his first relationship with a BOY. 

Loki went to open the door. His mother was standing at the door. Frigga was a woman who first deeply loved chocolate and her sons second. Other than that she had no vices in life. 

“Hello, honey.” She leaned to kiss her son on the cheek. Loki returned one awkwardly. He did have a man in his apartment. More importantly, a man his mother had heard about, but never met, yet here he was early in the morning. She was bound to leap to conclusions.

Frigga was a woman of considerable talents nurtured by her gossiping ties in suburbia. One of them was sniffing out potential spouses and now her senses zeroed in on Tony. 

“You haven’t introduced me to your friend.” She said casually. Tony held his breath as he waited for Loki to define the situation. 

“How rude of me,” Loki said aware that his mother JUST walked in and therefore there was no time to say other than hello. “This is the person I spoke to you about, Tony. We went trick or treating yesterday.” Loki was aware of his mother’s instinct to focus on key words like man or friend, so he tried to keep it neutral. 

“Is he joining us at the chocolate hunt?” She loved fishing for information when necessary, but she knew Loki will tell her everything when ready. 

“Sorry, I have an appointment.” Tony said before Frigga could even finish the question. He felt compelled to disclose some for information. “At the pet semetery.” He lied horrifically. Tony had nothing to do, but he felt like he was intruding on mother-son time. 

Loki understood the reference immediately and tried not to slam his face against the wall. 

“You have an appointment at the pet…semetery?” Frigga asked confused. “Is your pet ill?” 

“My friend’s. I am helping her move it.” The panic was real. Loki, on the other hand, was covering his mouth with his hands so he wouldn’t laugh audibly. 

“Well good luck.” 

“Thank you.” Tony said and immediately left. Just opened the door and exited. You are a massive idiot, he thought. 

“Well that was interesting.” Frigga said to brighten the mood. “He seems nice.” 

“Shall we go and buy some candy?” Loki said and took his keys. 

“Yes, let’s. Discount candy team assemble.” 

The store was half empty – most people were at home hungover – allowing the mother-son duo to pillage the chocolate section.

“These eyeballs look a little disappointed.” 

“Probably because you’re holding them.” Loki gasped. His mother was queen savage when it counted. 

“You are a permanent sunshine in my life, mother.” 

“I am a blessing.” Frigga took some more candy ghosts and looked at her son. He appeared to be happy. Much happier that he had been for a while. Tony seemed to be good for him. 

“I know that look.” 

“Uhum.” She hummed in response.

“I am not going to tell you about it right now.” He wasn’t entirely sure what to say anyway. Loki was never one to gush. Except about Luna. His cat was the best, she couldn’t tell anyone what he said. 

“Ok.” She dropped it for now. They still had a store full of things to explore. No one can resist the call of Target. 

“Let’s go look at the books.” Frigga suggested. Loki immediately lit up. 

“Please don’t let me buy too many.” 

“Hush, my child, there is no such thing.” If Loki hadn’t been told Frigga wasn’t his biological mother, he would still consider himself his mother’s child to a t.  
Loki was holding a giant book that promised to be filled with excitement and self-discovery. 

“hfh” Loki read aloud. “Charlotte flees to New Orleans to escape the scandal. But what happens when a Park Avenue Princess is forced to fend for herself? How will she adapt to the Big Easy’s bohemian lifestyle?”

“Is this not the most ridiculous thing you have ever heard?”

“Yes, dear.” 

“Don’t yes, dear me, mother.” Loki feigned offence. His mother was deep into reading – first the blurb and now the second page. There was no way they were leaving without the book. Frigga tore her gaze from the pages and looked at her son. 

"Is it a very good book?” he asked. 

“Yes.” 

“I wish people went to bookstores more.” Loki sighed. 

“You’re in the middle of a Target.” Frigga quickly retorted. 

Loki shot her a look. 

“Why, mother, I had no idea.” 

“That is a sickening amount of sarcasm. Mind you don’t waste it.” 

“hmph.” He couldn’t come up with a better response. 

“Not a word, dear.” His mother said as she went to past Loki to examine something that caught her eye. Eventually, Loki and Frigga exited with 2 bags each – one filled with chocolate and gummies and one with things they didn’t need. Among those things was some fancy stationary. He had a plan for it. 

The next day Loki went to Tony’s apartment and dropped off an envelope. He smiled to himself and went to work, avoiding to be seen by Tony who was just on his way from it. 

Tony was tired and wanted to play some videogames and have pizza and never adult again. The last thing was impossible, so 2 out of 3 wasn’t so bad. He was wondering what Loki was up to. He texted him last night, saying he figured out where they will go on their date, but refused to say where. At least one thing was going well, Bucky was grumpily finding his replacement but promised to hold his job should he want to come back. Other than that Tony was a nervous shaky ball of stress. At least he was faring better than Pepper who was now feeling the full weight of being a single mom. 

“What’s this?” he murmured to himself. He picked up the candy cane coloured envelope lying at his doorstep. The brunet felt kind of bad for accidentally stepping on it.   
It definitely bore his name, but it was not a handwriting he recognised. In this day and age, few people’s writing was and spidery and as ornate as this person’s. Yet there were few mistakes and barely any signs of hesitation. Tony decided to open it later. First, he took of his coat and changed into warm sweats. He made coffee and ordered pizza. Only after settling in did he look at the envelope again. For no real reasons he felt nervous looking at it. 

“Fuck this.” Tony threw abandon into the wind and tore it open. It contained a card with the same style. The same fancy handwriting greeted him. 

You are cordially invited to our first  
official date. Be at Barnes and Noble  
at 11 am this Thursday. Prepare for  
an adventure!   
Always yours, Loki   
XX

Tony smiled. Only Loki could organise a date in a bookstore. And then set it a day after delivering the invitation. Anyway, thought Tony, this was bound to be interesting and if there was going to be more kissing he was quite alright with that. Loki’s kisses were soft and abundant and so unlike the urgent, passionate ones he was used to. That is not to say Loki didn’t know when to turn up the heat. 

“Is your boyfriend not here?” Darcy questioned Loki. 

He sighed. “No, Tony is not here.”

“EXCUSE ME?! You are not denying he is your boyfriend. Spill the beans.” Darcy was excited, finally some gossip about Loki that was actually interesting. She resisted the urge to compliment him on his costume – true to his word Tony snuck in a couple of pictures when Loki wasn’t looking. There was that selfie too, but he didn’t show that to Darcy. 

In the background Steve heard the conversation. In all his time here, he never heard anything about Loki having an s.o. and it was about time he did. 

Loki leaned in. “He’s not my boyfriend. We are just going out right now.”

“Duh. That is a boyfriend.” Her face lit up. “You have a booooooyyyyfirend.”

“And you lack coffee. Order before I do it for you.” Loki mock threatened. 

“Haaa. Will you pay too?” 

“Sure, now go away.” 

“I never thought my first free coffee would be a bribe to leave.” Darcy paused. “Actually, that has always been a very real possibility.” Darcy walked to the other edge of the counter. “I will just wait for my coffee here. And thank you, kind sir.”

“Loki.” Steve was unsure what to say next. 

The tall man waited as the human golden retriever gathered his thoughts. 

“I just wanted to say, I’m happy you’re happy.” He gave Loki an awkward pat on the shoulder that he instantly regretted. 

“Thank you, but I am going just ignore this happened.” 

“It’s probably for the best.” They both agreed. 

At home Tony was still playing video games – Cuphead and Mughead was devilishly hard. He loved the look of it, the game was adorably retro, but daymn was it hard to beat. Occasionally his mind wandered off, not helping his progress, and he found himself thinking what he should wear to their date. At first, he wanted to wear one of his fancy-ass suits, but that might mean he is trying a bit too hard. Now, that he knows it is a book date, he is even less sure what would constitute appropriate attire.   
The next morning Loki could hardly wait to wake up. He was nervous but extremely excited for their first official date. Last night he could barely eat, his stomach was just a giant knot. Sif was not too happy to see her hard work remain un-digested. It felt good seeing her and finally having something to say that is not Darcy ordering three coffees instead of two. The neighbours glared at him, his bad-mouthing engraved in their minds, but nothing worse happened. Same went for Sif, they hated her the same amount as they did before. 

“Morning, Luna. It’s d day.” Luna was eyeing his cautiously. It was always disappointing when she couldn’t rest her anus next to his nose first thing in the morning. A chirpy Loki meant kisses and hugs and Luna wasn’t always about that life. 

Loki gave his cat a kiss and got up. Yesterday he succeeded in dressing her in an elf outfit to celebrate December beginning. She was a trooper and posed like a pro.   
He spent the morning having a cup of coffee and reading. It was supposed to be relaxing because there was no way he was being productive, but he was still nervous. What if this date was going to be a disaster? It was meant to be fun and give them plenty of opportunity to talk and get to know each other more. Or it could backfire horribly, and Loki was aware of that. 

At 9 am Tony was already panicking. He had plenty of books and sure he enjoyed reading them, but he never pretended to be an expert. Shamefully he bought most of his books online in the dead of the night. As if that wasn’t enough, he really couldn’t figure out what to wear that wasn’t his normal attire. 

“This is it, you have no more outfits to try.” Tony said to his reflection. It was nearly time for him to leave. He couldn’t afford to change again and risk being late. He took his keys and left. When he arrived there Loki was already waiting. Tony observed his long legs as they paced on the sidewalk. Could he be as nervous as he was?   
Their eyes met and Loki smiled as wide as he could. Seeing Tony made everything better. 

“Hello. You look nice.” He smiled. 

“Thank you. Unconventional dating techniques you have.” 

“I thought I would try out something new. Feedback would be appreciated.” 

“The note was a nice touch.” 

“I was worried it would be a bit too much.”

“Hell, no. From now on all our correspondence should be done like that.”

“That strikes me as unnecessarily complicated.”

“You’re right.” Tony smiled. “Just the date stuff then.” He paused. “Although, I don’t think that I could ever match your fancy handwriting.”

The walked in the store and Loki looked around where they should go. He found the right direction and answered. “It took a lot of effort to do that and I never use it anymore.”

“Anymore?” 

“I used to do letters for comic books. All the fonts and stuff like that.”

“My inner nerd is dying.” 

Loki changed the subject. 

“Here is the plan: we shall head for the romance section because today we have one objection – find the most absurd blurb there is and although I am aware other people’s reading preferences are valid, you have to admit that there are few genres that are as absurd as this one.” 

“So, we are blurb hunting.” Tony could get on board with that. 

They arrived to see a dazzling array of illustrated covers with skimpily-clad women and ripped men. 

“BTW, bonus points for finding a so-called bodice ripper. Not that I will be keeping a score.”

“What’s a bodice ripper and why do you know about them?” 

“Because Sif loves romance novels and I am sometimes obliged to hear about them. Bodice rippers are generally historical romances and involve some sort of violence   
and abduction. The ones from the 80s would even get as far as to involve rape and more outlandish things like necrophilia.” Loki explained. Tony’s eyebrows shot up. 

“Well who would expect that.” 

Loki sat down and started perusing the books. It occurred to Tony that he looked even more beautiful than usually. His hair must have been freshly washed because it looked silky and refused to stay put behind his ears. The strand that was particularly headstrong framed his face. 

He sat down next to him and made sure to be as close as possible. 

“I’m not sure this game will work if you stay so close.” 

“Well I do not aim to win it. I am here to steal your body heat. And kisses.” 

“Well you have no need to steal that.” Loki bent down and kissed Tony. It’s been three days since he did that and he was having some withdrawal. Their kiss was slow but deep. Loki followed it with a quick peck and went back to observing books.

He pulled one out – it had a particularly strange title. Something about ravishing a rose.

“Listen to this: 

Daughter of a nobleman exiled by Edward IV, Katherine Hartley's flashing beauty and hot-blooded pride took her from dire poverty to the dangerous glamour of Westminster Court. Threatened by royal intrigue, forced into satanic sacrificial ceremonies, Katherine finally discovered why her father had been labelled a traitor.” 

“Excuse me but satanic ceremonies? Kinky sex justification much? I am actually intrigued.” Tony was inspecting a book of his. 

“How about this: 

An innocent beauty is kidnapped by a handsome, powerful lord who mistakes her for his missing wife. Once Alexandra's heart is conquered in a new burning passion, their rapturous love is threatened by the schemes of the lord's vengeful enemies.”

Loki thought about it. “How do you mistake some one else for your wife? And even then, why are you off having sex with other women?” He was genuinely puzzled. 

“That reminds me, how is Pepper? Do you know when you need to take over for her?” 

“Strange leaps in your head, but other than that, Pepper is doing good, had a baby shower the other day.”

“And the job.”

“I was getting to that.” Loki arched an eyebrow. “I start next week. I’ll be working with her to make sure I know what I’m supposed to be doing. She warned me I’ll be swamped with work.”

“I believe in you.” Loki stated simply. Tony blushed. 

“I am so excited for Christmas.” Loki changed the subject. “It is my favourite holiday. Like you think about autumn, it is a state of mind. And gingerbread cookies.” 

“I’m not a fan.” Tony said.

“Oh, no, why?”

“Christmas parties are a special form of hell on earth. And my parents sure did throw a lot.”

“I see. I promise to kiss the grumpy out of you.” He smiled at Tony. This must have been a record, he couldn’t remember the last time he was this smiley. “And my mother is the supreme mother and loves to take care of any person she sees. At Christmas time she goes into a hyperdrive. No parties for us, but we always wrapped a lot of presents for underprivileged children.”

“Your mum sounds amazing. I am sorry I ran away the other day.”

“The pet semetary was quite an obvious lie. Don’t worry about it, we are on our first date, introducing you to our mother and then going shopping with us would be a bit much today, let alone then.” Loki found another book. The cover was very booby.

“Now this is stupid: 

Felicia was the illegitimate sister of a tavern-keeper. She felt nothing but terror when they told her that she had been chosen as the Duke's next mistress, and when they took her, decked in silks and jewels to the Silver Devil's bed... 

“Does this not sound amazingly rape-y?”

“Yes it does.”

Tony put in on a pile forming next to him.

“Why the pile?” Loki pointed at it.

“I need to find my female sexuality.” Tony joked. Maybe. 

“Those should definitely help.”

He leaned on his date and breathed in his scent. Creepy, sure, but Loki always has a wonderful scent. 

“Stop sniffing me.” 

“Never.” Loki put his arm around Tony. 

“Can I plan the next one?” Tony asked. He finally understood what people meant when they said your s.o. needs to be your best friend too. With Loki this romance stuff   
felt so effortless and comfortable, and despite the nerves the leap into sexy land was the easiest thing in the world.

“Of course.” He kissed the top of Tony’s head. He could feel it into his bones that this one was a keeper.

“It will be alright, we’ll make this work.”


End file.
